Vava's View

Like her or not, I do!

2012-02-01T15:26:00.000-08:00

I so dig digging until I find something I cannot live without (translation: it need not be pricey!). It may be a book - picture frame - footed tray - tarnished silver - those treasures that tickle my fancy.

Several years ago, my friend, Peaches, came to town and we hit The Guild Shop run by St. John the Divine. It's a resale shop that's a "cross between Antiques Roadshow and your grandma's attic." It takes a certain person to scour for hours. Peaches was my main gal!

I know several others who would lose their mind at The Guild Shop. Some {dear pals} I've not yet met other than through email, and an occasional phone call. We discovered one another on a certain lifestyle blog. And, it was there I learned I am not the only nut who enjoys the hunt, rearranges furniture {a lot!}, collects shelter magazines & books on decorating.

I cannot wait till they visit - we most certainly will bust down the doors of The Guild Shop! One of my favorite purchases is a vintage lamp. It's a personal thing. I know some do not "get" her; but every time I look at her, I smile. Well, the poor dear wore a horrible lamp shade for the past 2 or 3 years until just last week.

Let me introduce my little pretty:

I went to a lamp shop where an expert found just the right shade, and

shortened the harp (...and SHE told me SHE would have grabbed this ole gal herself). Like I said, some would, some would not.

Let me know if YOU have that certain something sitting in your haven, that may not appeal to your guests, but it sure tickles YOUR fancy.

Hhhmmmm.....may be time for a visit. To a thrift store.

Saturday-FUNday...in H-Town!

2012-01-21T18:53:00.000-08:00

What a FUN day....we headed into town for a couple of errands. Our favorite optometrist is inside the loop and it's time for a new look - I'm going the Tina Fey route. Or...Debra Messing in her upcoming show, "Smash." Darker frames, tortoise shell - a more intelligent look.

Our kale, blueberry and protein shake for breakfast was wearing off; so I googled. Although we are changing our way of eating, it DOES include a bit of protein. Burgers - as long as grass fed - are ok. Yup, I found where in Houston to eat such a burger!

The website will inform you of their location...they're always on the move. May I say, I thoroughly enjoyed {i.e., devoured!} my burger. Sans bun + fries. My piece of grass-fed beef was smothered with bleu cheese, burgundy-infused mushrooms, and "tipsy" onions. OMgoodness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On the way to the eye doctor, I chomped gum and chewed on mints to deflect those onions...poor eye docs! Those close encounters! Ewwwww. Any-hoo, had tons of fun picking out my new frames.

Time for a more serious stop. We went to visit #2 Son.....and felt like tour guides as we helped several couples learn the ropes. It's rather strange to feel comfortable on Baker Street in Houston. Our
boy is doing well - God is working within the system. He's been incarcerated for 9 weeks and is the most stable we've ever seen him. Since time heals all wounds, I am now ready (i.e., no longer angry) to wrap my arms around him. In fact, it kills me that we cannot touch. Talking through the speaker with a thick glass between us is NOT good for mother-love. Or father-love (especially since My Guy is so tender...).

Speaking of My Guy, he suggested another stop downtown - Phoenicia. We literally went around the world - it was fascinating to see so many countries represented in food aisles!!!!

An olive oil aisle that went on forever....

Coffees from every corner of the world!

Date Day in H-town is as fun as we make it folks! Something I want to be intentional about is to step out of my box. I want to explore - enjoy - and love my days to the fullest. I'm a lucky gal to have a Guy who wants to hang with me and do the same. 2012 is rockin' thus far!

CPR for The Soul!

2012-01-15T15:28:00.000-08:00

I love my "stuff" - it brings me comfort.
But, this is getting a little nuts...

That would be the make-up drawer of a product junkie! And, believe it or not, this is the stuff that I {only} use on a daily basis! I have more, hidden from sight.

It's hard for me to keep my "toilette" simple. But, it IS more appealing, the older I get. Really! Who do I need to impress? IF I get to that less is more look, I'll let you know.

All around me, it's always been more is more. Friends come over and ask:

"Vava, do you have enough black pencils?"

I think I'm ready to simplify - starting with that toilette of mine, getting organized and purging stuff!

AND, this unexpected season is a gift I never saw coming. The quiet in our home is just what the doctor ordered. Literally. I treasure my early mornings: coffee, journal, my daily must-reads, and time with Him.

In the afternoon, two dogs are it, when I walk in from work. No other demands of me. (Well, My Guy, yes. But I get home a few hours before he does.)

One project that will help organize me is on the drawing board. We are turning our study into a "library." It is heavy with furniture: BIG desk, and not-so-pretty free standing bookshelves. We no longer use the space as originally set up. I'd like to make every room user-friendly. John, the carpenter, came by last weekend to measure and the big reveal should be mid-February. By now, you know I MUST have tons of books. I plan on organizing them and putting all of them in our "new" room. The thought of a room for reading just about makes my head spin...in a good way!

Part of the reason for writing this year is so our son can read it when he comes home. He is a fan of mine (blog-wise) and will miss out on Life at Home for many months. He told My Guy and me: "...be strong, I am going to make it." Well, if HE is, so am I!

Another plan of mine is to be intentional in how I spend time. I don't want to waste it. I want to read more than watch TV. I'd like to do more with friends.

...have friends to our table. Talk. Laugh. Fellowship. Friends are "the stuff of life" I DON'T want to purge! They are a blessing.

Vava's List for 2012
1. Take less time to get ready in the mornings = purge products!
2. Purge each room monthly = dispose of stuff!
3. Get strong = exercise!
4. Read!
4. Stay connected to God!
5. Connect with friends!

Connect + Purge + Read = CPR for my soul!

It's All Mine!

2012-01-10T17:43:00.000-08:00

Rearranging, fluffing is my hobby.

Took over a corner in our master...

It's quite girly and makes me smile.

VavaVOOM!

2012-01-09T18:50:00.000-08:00

Nine days in and it's been a VERY, VERY good year. Many blogs tout a new year, new you; fresh beginnings, a brand new start. I am The Poster Child for these cliches! #2 Son is out of pocket. Let's be honest - he's incarcerated. Ok, he's in the slammer. On November 17, 2011 they took our "baby" away and I was cool with the court's decision. It had to be. As the judge stated, "...there is no other option." So, a good year? Yes!

Let me explain. Have you ever been worn out and so frail and frazzled that you became another person? This past fall, I turned into a dull, lifeless, lazy version of myself. Vava sans the voom.

A book I've posted about, A Perfectly Kept House is the Sign of a Misspent Life is my mantra. Inside, it's all about the cozy, imperfect interior as far as I'm concerned. Yet, during the fall 2011, MY innards were unkempt. I like my innards to be "perfectly kept."

I was furious and fed up with his antics. He was becoming a danger to himself and others. He is gone for a bit and now....our home is {once again} our haven. There is a palpable peace within. I enter with a smile. When gone from home, I long to be in it.

My innards are healing and I'm getting my "voom" back. I think I'll try my hand at blogging again. I've been fluffing around the home crazily. Can't help myself there. In our master, I removed the TV. Rest, relaxation and calm is what we need. I made a little corner all mine, a girly, "Vava" corner. It puts a smile on my face.

I am filled with anticipation and HOPE. Excitement is building - all around me. At work. Oh, and literally! We are building out our study...with tons of shelves. I need a library more than an office. What a delicious thought - a room to snuggle into to read. {sIgH!}

All the while, Jesus Calling has been by my side. That little book is better than a breakfast of Wheaties! And better than any book, is Jesus Himself. He's never left me. At times, I drifted...but He woos me back. He's my true "voom."

I hope to be around more and would like to raise a glass to each of you. Here's to a NEW year - let's all get our voom on!

Stop the Ride!

2011-10-04T02:13:00.000-07:00

     Where have I been you might ask? Or perhaps not. Probably not....but it's time for my soul to be typed out once again.  Eight (8) hours from now there will be a BIG change in our lives. How I wish it was a positive, exciting change. If you knew of it; you might feel sorry for us...but I don't want that. At all. Nope. It's a decision that, in the long run, WILL be positive for #2 Son. Well, we can hope.

     He will not see it as we do. He will hate us. I recall periodic bouts of "hating" my own parents as a youngster. But mine was because I was grounded. His hate will be different. His will be deep, rage-inducing. Or maybe he'll crack and fold up into a blob of agony.

     He is going to have to make it through a hellish season....one not many "normals" experience.  To be brutally honest, I pray he survives it.

     When #2 Son was 3, we would drive into town on Saturday to "play" with my Mom. I remember telling her, "I think I love him too much." She wisely said, "No, you love him just enough." He's been different since early, early on. Say 2 or 3 years of age. It's been a constant roller-coaster-life. For 17 years...

     And, in 7 hours + 55 minutes, the roller coaster may stop for a while.

Learn a Language!

2011-07-18T13:55:00.000-07:00

Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages spoke at our church yesterday on the two essentials for successful relationships. It was really good.

My sis-in-law went with us and since she's My Guy's sister, knows him well. She's always commented on how busy he is. My Guy cleans more than Mr. Clean! He loves a polished, granite kitchen counter. He loves being on top of the laundry. He mops that kitchen floor like nobody's business. And I don't. Those "acts of service" do not make me tick. What does? Words of affirmation. (You can take the quiz right here.)

And that is how I love others - by "wording." I am an encourager and a cheerleader. It's the way God made me. Oh, since God made My Guy too, I see! He's made uniquely. So, in order to live together well, it would help to speak the language of our spouse.

Mondays are my day off and I treasure them. We've been out of town a bit and had company for a bit; so it is time for a bit of peace. All I want to do today is curl up and read, putz around the house. It is my day off for goodness sake. But! My Guy enters the house around 5 pm and [I've always known] he appreciates dinner on the table and a spiffy home.

I better get going and do something around here - acts of service ya know. Goodness, I've only got an hour, 15...

What Soothes YOUR Soul?

2011-07-07T13:20:00.000-07:00

Sometimes a feeling comes over me that's hard to describe. It's like a punch in the gut but I call it nostalgia. A memory is sparked and if alone, I might even sigh aloud. Or I get choked up and all emotional. What spurs me to feel this way??? Sounds often do. A train whistle. I mean really....I stop dead in my tracks and revert to being 12'ish in summertime. That dove's coo as well.

Last night I was sitting on my back patio - tiny little patch of cement - with a tiny little glass of wine. Alone, I was leafing through a shelter magazine, featuring beach houses. Oh, my gosh, they are what summer is or should be! It stems back to my fondest memories of childhood spent at a beach home. Mimi's was grand; but I don't need grand: a tiny little cottage would do.

Check it out:

What a little home for happy-happy-joy-joy days! Oh, this is lOvE! There are no plans this summer for a trip to the sea. I will live vicariously through blogs and more magazines. Erin of EOS lives close to the sea and her blog set my imagination loose. (...and forced me to post these pics!).

The sea is it for me; no matter the season. Yet the older I get, the less I enjoy basking in the sun - give me a fall/wintery day of walking a beach and that's my idea of heaven on earth.

I also found this poster:

Curious if anyone else feels those gut wrenching bits of nostalgia? I know I should not envy, covet or look to my past. I don't think that's what I'm doing.

The sea cures much and soothes my soul. I'm just sayin'.

No Fireworks...please!

2011-06-26T15:01:00.000-07:00

There will most likely be a ban on fireworks due to the Texas drought! It's quite hot here. Yet, our gorgeous Dynamite Red Crape Myrtles finally blossomed.  We have two - on both sides of the house. We thought something happened cuz everyone else's crape/crepe (sp???) myrtles have been in full throttle. We had our downpour last week and look!

How funny that her name has an explosive connotation.  Planted by our homestead - thar she blows! We sure don't need fireworks around here: either the physical OR literal type! Thank you, very much!
On this very day our sermon was on JOY and we're told it's a must, i.e., a command in The Bible. Read 1 Thessalonians 5:16 a few times.  Ben Stuart preached on it today. He tells us: "Every time there is a 'when,' we rejoice."

Even today WHEN you-know-who is slipping and we see a shadow of darkness appear?

Ok, Lord....HOW!? Oh, yea. Joy is a gift. We receive this gift through The Holy Spirit WHEN we seek and ask!

JOY TRANSCENDS CIRCUMSTANCES.

...even WHEN the fuse has been lit!

As I tiptoe away from the fireworks of the flesh (it's so dangerous!), I contemplate on a sovereign God! And I am filled with joy at the thought that MY GOD is stomping on that fuse for me!

The joy of the Lord is your strength. (Vava)

Nehemiah 8:10

The Marvels of Monday!

2011-06-20T13:53:00.000-07:00

Isn't it marvelous what green spray paint and a new drum shade do to an almost 10 year old lamp?

I had a MARVELOUS field trip to Arbor Gate today...for some lavender.
(and they promised these would do well here with good soil, sun and afternoon shade!)

And while in my backyard; I couldn't help but admire this marvelous bit of nature. Love this plant!
Anyone know what it is???

Sis-in-law painted this whimsical bit of artistry to hang on her screened-in back porch.
Isn't it A-MA-ZING???? Quite marvelous, really!

MARVELOUS Monday began early for me with my cup of coffee and some quiet time. "Jesus Calling" is a favorite of mine. It's written as if Christ is talking directly TO you. And, almost every day..He does. To me! Today was no different...

(if you don't have this book, take a minute to read today's! You'll be blessed!)

I've been intentional in seeing God in everything. Trying to. It's a VERY cool way to live out your day! And, He gifted me with my favorite sound - yes, friends, you know what I love. The coo of a dove. I could hear him so well. And I looked out my bedroom window and there he was. Showing off. JUST FOR ME!

(a poor picture taken from inside...but no matter. He was there singing TO ME!)

Mondays are my day off and it's been simply MARVELOUS!

My prayer is that I walk with The Spirit and with eyes wide open tomorrow - at work, running errands, doing life. Try it, you'll like it!

Doing LIFE!

2011-06-12T10:57:00.000-07:00

I've had two months since my last post to refocus on LIFE. It's been full. Working part time has been interesting. I started out questioning myself. Self: why are YOU here? But, with great counsel (now a dear friend) by a wise woman...am just really leaning into it. Leaning on God, yes.......and what I cannot do, He can! And I can say that now I am enjoying it so much. It brings me joy and LIFE.

As much as I love entertaining, the preparation for a wedding shower at the homestead yesterday forced My Guy and I to focus Around the House and in the Garden (yes, it IS a book title!). What I cannot do, he can (small "he" vs large "He")! I'd like to take this time to nominate My Guy as Best Husband of The Year!!! Dug beds, laid flagstone, hauled dirt, planted, washed windows, mended fences. Without complaint.

This bed was enlarged; but due to the Texas drought, our new plantings are really suffering...

Sometimes smaller is more do-able. Surely I can keep the pots alive!

Life is good. I am surrounded by good teachers. All the day. As long as I'm intentional about keeping my eyes, heart and mind OPEN; I plan to learn. The wise woman once said to me a year ago (and this is huge!).

Does [insert activity] give you LIFE?

...it's been twirling around in my head since she first mentioned it. At that time; "it" wasn't. So I quit. There is a popular song on right now by Adele with the catchy phrase "I coulda had it all." Love the tune; but I don't want that as my theme song! We CAN have it all!!!!! I don't mean the material things; but those things that count! Peace, joy, harmony, love! And so, that's what I've been doing.

Doing LiFe!

Around the House and in the Garden happen to be two of my favorite things to work on. And also one of my beloved books. Page 198 just rocks!

"Keep close to the people you love, the ones who stay engaged and open to LIFE, who bring joy and peace to house and garden. Take with you everything you have learned - and remain humble enough to learn more." (Dominique Browning)

Perhaps on this Sunday when the sun goes down and the heat lowers, My Guy and I will sit in our garden. We can relax and enjoy it. Would THAT give me life? Oh, yeah!

Tell me...friends. What are you doing these days that gives you LIFE???

A Month of Sundays

2011-04-17T10:17:00.000-07:00

     It'd been "a month of Sundays" since I splurged on a Starbucks Caramel Macchiato. Thanks to a gift card, I did so today. Yum-o!

     It's also been a month of Sundays since we've worked the yard. Just haven't felt the pull. A looming "event" sort of forces me to clean up my act. I'm hosting a wedding shower in June...plenty of time to beautify the yard! :)

     I dusted off my favorite gardening book, "Blueprints for Harmonious Gardens" by Tara Dillard. Oh, you must visit Tara! Such wonderful advice:

1. Our exterior should match our interior (I mean really! How many of us love to fluff & stuff?) Gotta do the same outdoors.
2. Have a lovely view from inside looking out every window. Love that!
3. "Cute" doesn't cut it...in our yard.
4. Buy pretty pots. Even empty they'll look pretty.

And there's SO much more. It'd been a month of Sundays since I read her book. I revisit notes from Ms. Dillard, and as the Project Manager, tell My Guys what to do. And they're doing it!

Yard Guys

We're extending our front bed....but we're doing FAR more in the back yard.

Oh, I had to find out about that idiom I am using: A Month of Sundays. It was first recorded in 1832. One writer suggests it originally connoted a long dreary time, since games and other kinds of amusement used to be forbidden on Sunday. (Answers.com).

Back to the back: we have a flagstone terrace and Ms. Dillard suggested enlarging it. And so we are. I desperately wanted pea gravel between the stones; but every nursery expert My Guy talked to talked him out of it. My second choice was steppables, something green. We are going to plant the short, tiny mondo grass between the flagstones. The Guys are doing the heavy labor, I'll plant mondo.

I've got two months until the shower and I'd like to have a couple of other projects taken care of. I SO want my interior doors painted black. Anyone that reads Joni of Cote de Texas knows all about black doors. However, My Guy is really having problems embracing this notion. He lets me do anything I want so I shouldn't complain. But! As much as I love him...um, interior decorating is not his thing.

Just look at Joni's bedroom:

Cote de Texas

And may I quote: "Notice that my bathroom door is painted black - actually all the doors in my house are painted black. I think its a great look and a very inexpensive way to make a cheap, builder grade, hollow-core, paneled door look impressive, if that is at all possible."

I must get My Guy to read this post. :) Surely he won't be able to live with cheap, builder grade doors anymore!!

I'd like to raise my cup of Caramel Macchiato to you! Let's not wait a month of Sundays to do what we love.

Spring has sprung!

2011-03-30T20:01:00.000-07:00

Although I'm working now I get home early enough that I can cook dinner. Today was so dern pretty that I opted to take a book outside and soak up some Vitamin D. Mmm....it was a stellar spring afternoon!

No slaving in the kitchen tonight! We were having a picnic in our very own backyard AND pretending we were French! A petite baguette, two kinds of cheese, apples & grapes and an avocado. Yum!

#2 Son wasn't interested in such a petite dinner but came out later for chit chat, pictures and fun. He's the most sensitive of our boys and gets a kick out of My Guy and I enjoying each other. And, I rather like it too!

I'm in the suck-the-marrow-from-life mindset...hope it sticks!

Moving!

2011-03-24T05:09:00.000-07:00

Hey friends....I'm keeping Vava's View about life in general. And, so have dedicated a new blog to our story about you-know-who. I'd love to have you visit "A Son Called Reed." Thank you SO much for your encouraging comments on the first two posts!!!! As I've said many a time - what WOULD we do without girlfriends ♥?!♥

This Son Called Reed (Part 2)

2011-03-23T17:36:00.000-07:00

(ALERT: LONG POST!)

In kindergarten the nurse told us perhaps Reed had hearing or processing problems. If you hear the word “processing problems/issues”, I’d call that a red flag. Pay attention.

First, second, third grade. Shouldn’t these school days be about exploration, learning and just a BIT of fun? There was none of that for our boy while in school. He could be open and engaging until he entered the school room doors. They’d close and he’d close up. The light went out of his eyes. Teachers would be shocked when I’d tell them that, yes, he is (sometimes) happy and loving and fun at home.

In first grade he was class clown and the write-ups began. Back then “hyperactivity” was the buzz word and we fell for it and put Reed on Ritalin. His anger turned to rages that scared and shocked us to our core. The world was telling us he was a defiant, behavior problem and the world solution to this problem was time out, spanking or screaming like banshees. “He needs discipline!” was the mantra. I would get so angry at my baby I thought I was losing my mind. When it was over I was spent and utterly exhausted. Oh, yes…then we’d do our making-up-I-love-you-forever act.

God chased me down and in 1998 (2nd grade for Reed) I timidly attended a Bible study. As I looked around the circle of women God’s sense of humor was evident. Five of the group knew each other well. We had played Bunco together for many years. We’d often laugh – “from Bunco to Bible study.” A new season of life had begun. It was what my mind and soul needed. I ran into our bedroom that first night and jumped on our bed: “You won’t believe these women. It’s what I’ve been looking for – exactly what I need.” I was a novice in prayer but knew it would impact our children and our marriage. I began praying with Reed – talking to him about God – about the Bible. He was an open book – ripe to hear it all. It delighted my heart and filled me so full, at times I’d burst. It became a ritual to pray together –with his dear hands crossed, eyes closed he was my angel.

By the time he was in fourth grade I had no pride….about parenting. I became an open book. In my case this meant begging for prayer. I dubbed myself the “Prayer Hog.” I am not a fan of roller coasters, they scare me! Yet our life was one: ranting and raging. Next you might see us as the all American family – cute as pie, all kisses and smiles. Reed had been a love-bug since day one. His emotions ran the gamut but he loved just as fiercely as he raged.

In hindsight I am able to see where His hand was. God was smack dab in it with me. When I was in the fire it was about me or my sons, or stepping in between boys and husband. The focus was on The Circumstance. My focus was not on the Lord. The Hand of God (HOG) moments are pretty cool. They came in the form of just the right song on the radio, that day’s devotional, an email or in human form. There are no coincidences. I’m of the belief that every, single, solitary, teeninsy detail is in the hands of God!

HOG Moment

Reed’s elementary years were a challenge to put it mildly. It was a real struggle for my boy who was unable to voice what was happening in his little body and mind. His teachers were also challenged. He was a regular visitor to the principal’s office.

I saw said principal at our church when Reed was in high school. She had always been kind and gentle to us. I walked up to her a bit hesitant…and as she turned, a smile flooded her face. “How is our Reed? I’ve been praying for him all these years.” Do you see it???? The hand of God!

(Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.) - Deuteronomy 31:6

Fourth grade was a turning point. Toward the end of that year, Reed’s anger was routine and aimed at authority figures. It could be the soccer coach, a teacher or his parents. Our home life was tense. We walked on eggshells never knowing when he’d blow. The word “no” was the switch that turned our sweet-faced, handsome boy into a raging tiger. As intense as each episode was the making up was just as intense. Reed and I do love fiercely! Always have. Our baby would be beside himself with remorse and we’d fall into one another, hugging and loving each other. I’d ask his forgiveness and he’d ask mine. All was well. Until next time…

Reed was placed in special education for his learning disabilities and we had rights under the IDEA (Individuals with Disabilities Education Act). We met with his teachers once a year. These (intimidating) meetings were called ARDs. They were a resource to help parents and families of students who are eligible for special education supports and services. Waiting for the meeting to begin made ME feel like the student!

I worked full time and the afternoon was interrupted by one of those dreaded phone calls. “Mrs. ___, Reed was brought to the principal’s office for acting out. He proceeded to tell the principal *@# and then ran out of the office. We had to call the school police. You’ll need to come pick him up.” It was a Friday. Our fourth grader was expelled from school until the following Wednesday.

We took our son home clueless about his future education. I turned on The Oprah Winfrey show at 4 pm. The promo stopped me dead in my tracks. “Is your child ADHD or Bipolar?” Two checklists were on the screen. Why, I believed we had a 10 year old with Bipolar Disorder. Oh…the school district had made an appointment with a psychiatrist for us the following week, before he could return to school. They did have four years’ worth of files on him.

Enter scary psychiatrist. Me: “Sir, if I may…I believe he may be Bipolar.” Doctor: “No, duh. Why’d you take so long to get here?” We agreed with everything he said. We believed him. And trusted him. At that point, it’d been seven years of fits. We did not know what else to do. And so…we put our son on heavy psychotropic drugs. Those were for Bipolar; and since he was ADHD we added that pill to the mix.

It was time for the ARD in fourth grade which included the psychiatrist’s report. My husband and I entered a conference room and were joined by the principal, teachers, school psychologist and a few others. There were piles of files on our son. Every write-up was documented. Every phone call was noted. Remember how much I hated caller ID!

This Son Called Reed (Part I)

2011-03-21T15:37:00.000-07:00

I meet five women on Mondays for coffee and chatting about the love of writing. And it's one loving circle of encouragement. I think perhaps I'm to write a story. About Son #2. It's real. And raw. You may not think so highly of me but I'm okay with that. The Beginning:
____________________________________

I hated caller ID. I learned to pray “…help me, Lord” before I even looked at who was calling. It was such a relief when it wasn’t from the school district. I have my son’s permission to tell our story.

No one knew the anger that bubbled inside of me. No one knew how it only erupted when my sons pushed my buttons. The 6 pm glass of wine was much too appealing. Burying myself under the covers sounded heavenly. Running away from parenting was a consideration. And afterward I’d closet myself far from the family in tears, begging God for forgiveness, mercy, and help!

Where to begin? How about when he was in daycare? As young as three years old, our son was an angry soul. I recall once driving down the street, glancing over at my little cherub and the vitriol out of his mouth shocked me so I had to stop the car.

In pre-K, the teacher called me to a corner and with a very solemn face proceeded to prophesy over his future. “He’s not ready for kindergarten. I’d hold him back if I were you. Are you having problems at home? Is there a lot of anger in your house? Something is just not right with your son…”

And so the story begins. I didn’t pay heed to that teacher and placed him in first grade. I simply could not deal with him more than I had to. I was one of those parents who hoped another’s influence would change him.

______________________________________________

New Things!

2011-03-17T15:47:00.000-07:00

Have you missed me? I've been MIA for a good reason. I returned to work - 25 hours a week and even that's put a kink in my energy level. I have Emergen-C on my (work) desk. It's a necessity.

New thing #1: Returning to work is part of the plan God (obviously) has for me. While going to a class Thursday mornings on healing life's hurts, I had one of those "aha" moments. We learned that if we've judged; it's coming right back at us. Let me give you an example. I posted on my bosses and once upon a time I cloaked each with an adjective: abusive, dismissive, condescending, etc. I judged the bejeebers out of them. In almost every position, "Mr. Hart" was my boss. I'd ask My Guy "WHY do I have a boss like this? What is the meaning behind this?" And, I'd bad-mouth, judge, gripe about how horrible they were to me. Sort of bitter....ya know?

Dabney Coleman as "Mr. Hart" in Nine to Five.

During Sherry's class three weeks ago, she talked about bitter roots. We have to PULL THEM OUT, get rid of them. I had an epiphany....I judged them therefore continued having the SAME type of supervisor in my life...Can you say "AHA!?"

On the evening of February 23 our home phone rings and I hear: "Virginia, this is Pastor Dan. I'd like you to come work for me." Huh??????????????? Dan is one of our church pastors.....and My Guy and I have to count him as a favorite in our church! To make a long story short, I met with him two days later and learned about the position. I left absolutely giddy. And excited. And peaceful. And scared. The job is a stretch; but how else does one grow?

This is week two. It's going to be good. It's all new at this point but I am most thankful that God has answered a prayer of mine - what do YOU want me to do, Lord? How can I serve YOU? My new boss is a godly man - filled with kindness, joy, and creativity! It's just SO cool!!!!!!!!!!!

New thing #2. I've gone green. No, I'm not talking about my green sofa. I traded in my honkin' gas guzzler SUV for a 2006 hybrid!!! 30 - 35 mpg! Woo-hoo. And, my "work" aka church is 7 minutes from home!!!

New thing #3: Helen (mother-in-law) is in HER new home. She is ensconsed safely in The Silverado which is an Alzheimer's facility. It is LOVELY!!! And the care givers have such compassion. It's small, close to My Guy and his brother. Hey, that's sort of green too, right?

Spring is also green and all about renewal, regrowth and rebirth. I'm feeling it in many areas of life. And if you don't know by now, I do love a good adventure!

Zip-a-dee-doo-dah!

2011-02-25T12:18:00.000-08:00

Zip-a-dee-ay!

My, oh my, what a wonderful day

Plenty of sunshine headin' my way

Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay

Winter 2011 was crazy cold...especially for Texas. I neglected our yard. As bright and sunny as today is, my yard is sad, sad, sad.

Dry, brown, dead. Pathetic plants!!!! My bad!

I did not even attempt to keep these babies warm...

But, today is a good, good day (think "Black Eyed Peas" song!)....

(can you tell I'm singing a lot today???)

I've got a little spring in my step at the thought of

getting in the yard.

Gotta doctor these darlings to good health. But is there hope?

Ahh..............some GREEN!

And the zing in my step is also due to a potential change in my life.

It excites my soul.

God made me flexible - a lover of change.

I'll fill you in soon.

HAPPY FRIDAY TO YOU ALL!

Double the Pleasure!

2011-02-15T16:56:00.000-08:00

An original by D. Ballard

If you've kept up with this little ole blog of mine you know I've been waiting on our new sofa.
In the meantime, a dear friend of mine was working on a piece.
I had commissioned her...."to paint what her heart desired." I love her work. I trust her.
The only thing she asked of me was the color GREEN of my sofa.
I matched it to a Sherwin Williams color....and waited.

First came the sofa.

She arrived on a Saturday...and was missing that certain sumpin-sumpin...
I hope you've got a color in YOUR home that puts a smile on your face.
This GREEN baby does the trick for me!!

And, then SHE was unveiled....
And the whole family fell in love.

I plan on framing her but had to hang her first. The Artist and I both see the same type of frame:
...a painted gold wood, rather wide frame. How about you?
What do you see framing her, to add to her beauty?

It was a good week! Double the pleasure, fo sho!

No Longer

2011-02-12T15:48:00.000-08:00

It's been two weeks since my father in law died.

A recent phone call hit My Guy and his siblings when they were told:

"He has been cremated."

And jogged my memory as well...

No matter our age we long for the love of our parents.

There was quite a family gathering for Mimi's funeral.
A couple of nights prior to it, we were at Dad's in Long Island.
He asked me where Mom was....to which I replied: "On my mantel."

He knew Mom would prefer her ashes be sprinkled in the Atlantic over a mantel in Texas.

Since one of my brothers had not left Texas I told him to bring her north.

"Really sis?" "Really." And so Mom joined us.

Some may think it morbid but it was a lovely gesture on Dad's part.

They'd been divorced for years and his Mom had just died.

He was thinking of OUR mother. I'll never forget the evening.

My Guy and I and our then 11 year old #1 Son. My two brothers and their wives. And Dad.

We wore shorts and sweaters. As the sun went down that summer evening we held hands

and walked an East Hampton beach. We each took a handful of ash as our toes hit the surf.

We flung it as far as we could and prayed in our own way.

Dad read a Scripture from the program of his Mom's funeral.....and some cried.

It was a beautiful, touching service.

Some peeps sitting on the perimeter of my life might give Dad a failing grade.

He has not been very involved. And I know that. And at times it hurts. And...I love the man.

Recently Ron Reagan, Jr. wrote about HIS dad:

"Like all my siblings, I loved my father deeply, at times longingly.

He was easy to love but hard to know."

Longingly. There it is. As an adult I long for intimate talks and time with Dad.

And I know him. It's not going to happen. Yet Dad has come through at a few incredible moments.

Mom went through a horrendous medical procedure when she was ill.

He flew down here to visit her.

If one could bottle Light & Laughter in human form my Dad is it.

Well, he knows when to be it. I know he was Mom's best medicine during her illness.

Dad is the life of any party and turned his own Mom's funeral into a more memorable occasion.

As his daughter, I've inherited the love of a party.

We recently had a sad-cation with My Guy's Dad passing.

Are you allowed to have FUN while mourning?

We had twelve family members stay with us.

The fire roared, air mattresses were all over.

Patty's guacamole and my queso were wolfed down.

The wine flowed. Two great nieces were happy to be here (i.e., out of school)

and did their homework in the midst of it all.

#2 Son commented that he wished we had company every night.

The sad-cation is over - that is - company is gone. My Guy is back at work.

Life goes on. But it'll never be quite the same without Don L.

I'm sure My Guy longs for one last talk with his Dad.
And his Dad was available to him.

Larger than life, he filled a room when he entered.

Interesting. Both our Dads have (or had) quite a presence.

How two weeks out of your year can really change the course!

And it's made me think - I don't want my boys to LONG for me.

I don't think they will. They know they have me.
Whenever they want.

I think as parents that's the most important thing we can do.

Be available and love your children.

Tracy Porter Treasure!

2011-02-09T17:35:00.000-08:00

Can you imagine???? Winning this bit of beauty???? I can only dream...

Our Helen

2011-01-30T02:57:00.000-08:00

It has to hurt...losing your right arm. Whether you were lovebirds or crankpots, losing a spouse after 67 years has to hurt.   My father-in-law passed away two days ago and we're reeling and dealing with the many to-do's. Family and company heading this way, arrangements to make, pictures to sift through, words to put to paper.

There are three siblings and each is mourning differently.  Then we have our Helen, the widow left behind. In the space of three and a half minutes she asked her daughter: "Where's Don?" And that was only three and a half minutes of the day. My Guy was asked a number of times where his dad was. Me too.

Our Helen has changed so much since 2004 when she and Her Guy informed us she had the beginnings of Alzheimer's. She has the nature of a sweet young girl. She smiles often and enjoys the human touch. She was a reserved person before the Alzheimer's. It seems there is a silver lining in everything, even in aging.

At 2:30 am My Guy and I found Our Helen in our bed. Smiling. She crawled in by her son and patted him. And smiled. My heart ached. My Guy is gentle with her now, but we all are because she deserves it. To see him tenderly give her cough medicine was a precious sight indeed.

Life for my mother-in-law has not been easy.  She is from the old school and waited on her man like he was king. As an outsider speaking, uhhh, there were times when he didn't deserve such royal treatment. Yet, she rarely complained. It was what she knew. And what she did.

Although we are honoring the life of Don and will miss him terribly; I think it's time to honor Our Helen.

She's always been in the background you know. It's her time.  Time to treat her like a queen and wait on her. Not that she craves, expects, or wants such attention. All she wants is Her Don.

i LoVe LuCy!

2011-01-26T06:21:00.000-08:00

Allow me to introduce you to LUCY!
...only a kindergartener and her life is already story-bookish. Her mom has a fab blog.
Lucy's mom and I are fans of Tracy Porter. That's where we "met."
It seems Lucy loves Tracy too.
And now TRACY has LUCY's fashion video on HER blog!
Please visit Tracy and leave a comment! :)
She has a video or two on YouTube too. It'll make YOU want to be jazzy & funky!
There is a campaign stirring: "I LOVE LUCY." I'm thinkin' she needs an agent!
Have you ever seen such a Plum Blossom?

Be still my heart...

Around the house...

2011-01-19T09:49:00.000-08:00

A blog I follow, Views From My Kitchen Sink, is always a good read. That Pam has great posts and so today I'm linking up with her.

WHAT I'M EATING

Above you'll find my morning ritual. It never varies....been drinking protein shakes now for 7+ years. It started for the ease of it. I knew I needed breakfast and this was slam, bam EASY! And then a visit to an MD who was also into holistic stuff...took my cortisol levels. Yikes!!!! Yes, I WAS addicted to sugar and ate far, far too much. She informed me by starting my day with protein, my cravings for sugar would diminish. Coffee is a no brainer although my Keurig is new. I've been a loyal fan of the Toddy for twenty years and will stick with it for iced coffee. Nothing better - smooth java.

WHAT I'M DOING

I'm waiting on My Guy to finish organizing enough ski paraphernalia to open a shop. Bless the man...he's just returned and does have a full time job.

WHAT I'M DECORATING

No pictures...yet, BUT I am one excited girl. "The" sofa has been ordered and it's GREEN! Little did I know how versatile it shall be until a friend pointed me to "Colour Me Happy's" blog post! Can't wait.

WHAT I'M LISTENING TO

I'm a music NUT...and with DirectTV, there is quite a menu! My Top 3 show that not only will my sofa be versatile, but my music taste is too!

#1 Choice: Channel 826 "The Spirit" (Contemporary Christian)

#2 Choice: '70s Hits (when I need that pick-me-up)

#3 Choice: Light Classical (this is brand new. One of my how-to-speak or how-to-write authors insists "baroque" music helps one think. I need all the help I can get...)

My Guy came in from work last night to #3 blaring throughout the house. It was NOT his #1 choice!

WHAT I'M READING

Beth Moore's is our current Bible study.
"Palace Walk" was recommended by my stepmom a while back. I've just started it and hope I can get through it.
"Speak Up with Confidence" was recommended by a friend who DOES speak and knows my desire to do so.
"Get Lucky" is by a friend of a friend. Haven't opened it yet....
"Sundays at Tiffany's" - heard it was light and an easy read. Will see...
"Little Bee" - well, everyone in Blog Land has read it, so I hope too as well.

And so what are YOU doing, reading, decorating and listening to?

Footnote

WHAT I JUST DID

I had to force myself outdoors....and am so glad I did. God created a symphony for me! Took the Lake Walk...

The sun so bright my dark glasses were a necessity.
Birds flitting about as if they were dancing.
The pine needles and trees were washed in two of my favorite colors: russet and green.
And there sat an old woman with a halo of white curls...knitting by the lake.
I stopped to talk and we both gushed on the beauty of the day.
She told me concentrating on her knitting forced her to be less thankful.
She prayed to God to forgive her for her half-hearted praise.
And she said all of this in a beautiful Brazillian accent.
He knows her heart.
And He knows just what I needed for a mid day break!

Life of Vava

2011-01-15T10:49:00.000-08:00

I cannot help myself. Always on the prowl to tweak or fluff. It's a lot easier to create vignettes
than to remodel and so that's what I do...
a lot.

It's especially a "must" after receiving a FABULOUS gift!!! The books above are vintage and entitled "The Life of ____." (our last name!). I squealed like a little girl and even My Guy was blown away.
They deserved a spot on our coffee table.

And often while in the blogosphere I see that certain sumpin-sumpin that I must carry out myself! A friend pointed me to what Katie did! And then Vava did it too. I zoomed to Lowe's for a painter's drop cloth to drape my dining table. A cheap, chic look!

And then tossed a Venetian mirror (another gift from a pal) atop said cloth....and sprinkled candles around.
My table cloth does not look as styled as Katie-did's does; so I can't post a full length picture yet.
But you see the texture - color of it???? It's just yummy!

After Christmas is the perfect time to look around and tweak a bit. On my buffet I changed out trays but kept my "Christmas vignette" in tact. I'll probably keep the ornaments here for a while...some are old and vintage and I {{{love}}} Christmas...so why not?

Then there were the six botanicals in the dining room that nobody saw...
I moved them out to the foyer with a couple new lamps. With the prints filling up the entire inset wall,
my tiny foyer seems bigger.

I dig change and think it's good for the soul. A positive to having ~~clutter~~ collections/stuff around is I
can shop my own home!

Welcome to a day in The Life of Vava.

RE-Think the New Year!

2011-01-13T13:47:00.000-08:00

REJOICE!

This looks to be a random post....sort of all over the place. How it started was this shot of clouds last night. I notice the sky and clouds and have since my Mom passed away 17 years ago. I remember shortly after her death, I was driving home from work, flying down the highway and as only Texas can offer, had a wide open view of heavenly beauty. I knew it was a gift from God.

He's been doing that a lot - gifting me! I have tons to be thankful for!!!

Lately I feel as if I'm wrapped in the arms of My Father.

RESTORED!

(#2 Son getting a "tie the tie lesson" from HIS father...)

And I like that feeling - safe and loved. Who doesn't need that, right?

Day # 13 of the new year - and it may be the best start to a year in a long, long time. My menfolk are having the time of their lives. You might say, they're having a mountain top experience!

REJUVENATED!

Skiing for six days in bitter cold is not for everyone. But My Guys can't get enough!

RENEW!

And I've had lots of quiet time....that I reveled in after our week in New York.

While in New York we had the opportunity to ~~party~~ socialize with a younger set. My "sister" and I are quite a bit older than our handsome nephews and their beautiful wives. However, age matters not when one has a gusto, a zest for life! A (younger) person commented on stories she'd heard about Patty and I.

It seems our reputation preceded us...that we "seemed to always have fun."

Well, of course!!! You must suck the marrow from life.

I'll be working those "re" words: restore, rejuvenate, rejoice, renew for 2011!

HAPPY (RE)NEW YEAR!!!

Who's Like Us?

2011-01-08T14:01:00.000-08:00

Welcome to New York City!!!!

I had SO MUCH FUN!

How CAN one girl have so much fun asked a friend..

Well, when you meet the folks I hung with for a week, you'll see.

I love words!

I love faces!

So, I'm putting words TO these faces.

PRAYERFUL

(or perhaps here she's soaking in the reverie!)

LOUD (said "reverie")

HIP!

GLAM!

BROTHERLY LOVE

BEAUTY

ADORABLE

(more) BROTHERLY LOVE

SOUL SISTERS

SOPHISTICATES

SASS & CLASS

LOVE

COLORFUL

GRACEFUL

PARTY MODE

PLAYFUL

FANCY FEET

(and you should see their faces!)

GIDDY

FUN & GLOSSY

~~TOASTED~~ UHHH, A TOAST!

LOOPY

CAMARADERIE

GIRLS

DUDES

BLESSED

Yes, I am pouting. I didn't want to leave...

We laughed from sun up to sun down, ran all over New York, danced the night(s) away. Made new friends I'll never forget. A wedding wooed us to the city and my prayer is that my nephew and beautiful wife live happily ever after. And they will as long as they lean on one another and their families.

My father has a favorite toast. And, so to everyone that attended, I'd like to raise my glass and say:

Who's like us? Damn few!

The Rx: A 7-Day-Hug!

2010-12-27T14:39:00.000-08:00

Seven days. One week. Away. I've packed and repacked: trying to be a smart packer. Black is the only color necessary as I AM going to New York. 20" of snow due to hit there tomorrow...just as we fly into it. Great. Breathe Vava. The "events" are not until the end of the week so we'll (eventually) make it.

Our nephew is marrying the love of his life on January 1, 2011. 1/1/11 - isn't that clever?? My Guy and I and most of the fam are winging northeast over the next few days. Fun times in the city.

Believe it or not, I'm a bit hesitant to leave. Over the years I usually felt relief when I was able to sneak off. I so needed a break...back then. These past six months have been an absolute life-changing season for the three of us - one we never DREAMED possible. We enjoy one another. A lot!

#2 and I were just in the kitchen all by ourselves. I asked if I could have a "7-Day Hug." He allowed it. And there we stood in the middle of our kitchen, Christmas still around us, hugging each other like nobody's business. I prayed too - for our safe travel, his safety at home, favor with a new job (tomorrow), wise choices while we are away. Out LOUD. He lets me do that. After....he said with a smile: "Now, that was a 7-Day-Hug." I'd say so!

Some folks think miracles are mythical. I'm here to tell you they are real. We ARE one. The rapport, bonding and respect that flows among us was missing for many years. We always had the love; but love isn't enough.

In hindsight I am thankful for every struggle. I would not be appreciative of what's going on now. If I told you some of those things...you might say, "...why Vava, that's normal." Not so in our case We've never known normal.

And so My Guy and I jet off tomorrow for New York for a get-away and an elegant wedding. Who wouldn't be excited? I am. And I'm not. I look at #2 Son and shake my head in awe. I thank God for restoring our family. (...and I pray all is well upon our return).

Maybe just one more "7-Day-Hug"?

Party Rules

2010-12-24T03:07:00.000-08:00

It was down to the wire and I was unable to pull an "Eddie" after all. Alas, the doorbell rang at 7:02 and our first guests arrived. RULE: You're first, you help. And they did. Chopping and pouring with a smile!

The egg nog was a vision- egg whites frothed to perfect peaks with a sprinkling of nutmeg. As I've mentioned before our annual party is going on its 18th year. RULE: Stick to a menu you know and that you are known for. Vava's would not be Vava's without:

Gala Pecan Spread

8 ounces cream cheese (soft)

2 Tablespoons milk

1 (2.5 oz) jar of dried beef (slice it up)

1/4 cup green pepper (finely chopped)

2 Tablespoons dried onion flakes

1/8 teaspoon pepper

1/2 cup sour cream

1/2 cup pecans (coarsely chopped)

2 Tablespoons butter

1/2 teaspoon salt + 1/2 teaspoon garlic salt

Combine cheese and milk. Stir in beef, green pepper, onion flakes and rest of seasonings.

Mix well. Fold in sour cream. Spoon into an 8" pie plate.

Saute pecans in melted butter, then salt lightly. Sprinkle nuts over cheese mixture.

Heat in 350 oven for about 20 minutes. Serve warm with crackers or raw veggies.

This is a staple "hors d'oeuvres" of Vava's!

(From my very first cookbook purchased in Dhahran, Saudi Arabia 33 years ago!!!)

THE Best Artichoke Dip EVER!

2 cans (14 ounces each) non-marinated artichoke hearts - drained

1 cup mayonnaise

1 cup freshly grated parmigiano-reggiano cheese

3-4 cloves garlic, minced

2 Tablespoons sherry

Dash of cayenne

Dash of paprika

Mix and mash the drained artichoke hearts, the mayo and the parmesan cheese with a fork. The mixture should be thoroughly mixed but with a few lumps. Do NOT puree. Add garlic and sherry. Mix thoroughly. Put mixture in a small souffle or casserole dish and top with dash of cayenne and/or paprika.

Bake uncovered 15 minutes at 300.

(Recipe states: "It will be eaten before it cools.") Pretty much.

Corn Dip

2 cans Mexicorn or Fiesta corn - drained

1 cup mayo

16 ounces sour cream

1/2 bunch cilantro, chopped

3-4 green onions, chopped

2 cups grated cheese

1 teaspoon cayenne

1 teaspoon cumin

1/4 teaspoon lime juice

Mix, let chill well and serve with Frito scoops or crackers.

None of these are gourmet material...but here's another RULE: serve "plain/ordinary" stuff in your pretties. Crystal bowls, pretty serving pieces dress that corn dip up. I'm just sayin'.

We couldn't possibly have squeezed another human into our kitchen. Why is this always the case? We DO have other rooms in our home. The noise level was VERY loud which translates FUN times.

RULE: Invite interesting people. There won't be a lull in conversation.

Both our sons are home and were "working" guests last night! #1 Son and My Guy made a second batch of nog in the middle of the party. Cracked 12 eggs, separated whites from yellow. They hovered over my huge mixer reading the recipe line by line. It was adorable.

RULE: put the fam to work!

We're casual especially at home and some have a bravado and sense of humor

that ummm, some may not "get."

#2 Son (restored, happy & content) with #1 Son (wearing his "Tacky Christmas Sweater Party" attire from a party in Austin last week.) Needless to say he got a few laughs

RULE: Shop vintage and make the most of it!

The party started with a bang early on. And all were gone fairly early...considering. I looked at our kitchen and was overwhelmed with the remains of the day. But My Guy rolled his shirt sleeves up and started the process. Together we whipped our kitchen back into shape.

RULE: Have a spouse that loves hosting as much as you do and cleans BETTER than you do!

As we end 2010 I'd like to wish each of you blessings galore. Two days left until His birthday. I hope we all get a minute or two to slow down and honor HIM.

Kisses to you!

xoxo

Vava and Her Guys

A HEART-Felt Christmas!!!

2010-12-15T09:16:00.000-08:00

10 DAYS LEFT...

With oh so much to do! No stress though...my heart is full.
THIS Christmas is very different from the last several.
My Guy has heard me exclaim: "I want this one to be fabulous!!!"
My perfect Christmas today isn't about gifts...

(Christmas in Connecticut 1960)

Ahhhh, but looking back...
I see the doll I wanted.
The robot my little brothers wanted.
Want-want-want.
(Do you notice a trend here?)
In those days it WAS about the gifts!
As it was for my sons growing up...
Which is fine - that's the norm.

Five years ago the four of us spent Christmas in Connecticut.
It was the first one with my father since I was a little girl.
I imagined the picture perfect holiday.

It was an absolute beautiful setting.

Gifts galore.

Dressing to the nines.

WHAT????????????

Oh, yes, we had to "dress" for dinner.

You ask how that went over with our two boys?**

#1 was 22 and two weeks from going into the Army.

#2 Son was 15 and in a (very) rebellious phase of life.

**(like a lead balloon...)

A wish was granted. I shared Christmas with my Dad and his family.

It was different than Texas holidays spent with My Guy's family.

Our gatherings are chock full of craziness, laughter and loudness!

And a whole lotta HEART!

And so I've got 10 days to make the Christmas magic.

I think this year it's going to happen...

Our sons are in a good place.

A few of our favorite things:

Egg Pie

Forgotten Cookies
Our 18th Annual Christmas Party

Amy Grant's "Tennessee Christmas"

And don't forgot the heart!

My prayer is that I have a warm, welcoming, open heart...and door.

That when I open my door, I offer the gift of hospitality.

I also pray my heart softens to those alone or just a bit different.

And most of all that my family remembers this Christmas with the fondest of memories.

Mother Nature Calls

2010-12-11T10:03:00.000-08:00

I like my alone time and always have. Ever since I was a young girl.

I slipped away for hours entertained by my imagination and books.

In the quiet woods of Connecticut.

It's there where I transformed into whom I longed to be. Confident, brave and happy.

Jumping from boulder to boulder, I was a heroine defending the poor.

Or meeting My Prince who would swoop me away.

The summers I spent with Mimi filled my soul with the love I craved. And acceptance.

Yet - I'd still have to get away. The dunes and ocean were my haven.

I walked for hours dreaming of my future.

In hindsight I know (without a doubt!) I was not alone. I felt a presence...always.

Mother Nature in all her glory always soothes my soul.

This morning I had to get out there. There is no ocean but a little lake nearby.

Rather pretty....for H-town.

Before I left the house, though, I purposed to have my eyes open. I wanted to revel in His glory.

And there, for me, everything I love:

Deep fall colors
Pine needles
A breeze
Sunshine
Ducks

Winding down....and I am praising God for such beauty. Almost skipping (praying no one sees me!)

And His last gift was waiting there. Just for me.

Swimming on the lake were drakes and mallards: green, brown...

This little guy - all alone - pure and white.

Ahhhhh.....Mother Nature how I love you. And thank God for your beauty!!!

Less is More!

2010-11-30T09:37:00.000-08:00

I've used that saying in reference to make-up, jewelry, clothing. Now I am applying it to my Christmas decorating! In unpacking BOXES of Christmas goods; some items are tired and some I am tired of! Using restraint for the first Christmas ever; I am not pulling out all the stops. There are certain spots in the house that I WANT to look like Christmas. Other places - not so much.

I'll pack away some stuff and hope that one day my sons will want to "inherit" some of the Santas and cute stuff.

I left our entry very simple....and yet it makes me happy.

The liqueur set was Mom's.
The silver tray was a gift from a friend last Christmas. A vintage treasure!!

Most of our buds come through our back door; but IF you enter our front door you will see this merry vignette:

And so onward we move...tomorrow is December 1 and the house is finished. I've just got to ~~(bribe)~~ get My Guy motivated to help with the tree.

I am most hopeful for a stress-less Christmas season! Sometimes less really is more!

Command Central

2010-11-24T07:02:00.000-08:00

Here is a corner of my kitchen. I call it command central...especially at this time of year! The green box holds the notes I've taken the last 18 years for our annual Christmas party! It's a blast to peruse the guest list...and see if they are still around or quietly slipped out of our lives.

I keep notes of the stuff served, recipes are clipped.

Today is the day before Thanksgiving and the cooking begins!!! (I've added this holiday to my "Christmas box.") I have tear sheets in it of vignettes, table settings, decorations. A little treasure chest just for me! I glance through it daily...from today through Christmas!

It's easy for me to get swept away in all the fa-la-la-la-la! I'm a Christmas nut! ...and I have to force myself to be disciplined in the other aspects of life. I am not exercising enough. And my time with the Lord in the mornings seems a bit rushed. Just like everyone else - I am hurrying & scurrying.

I did take time (a second) and read "Streams in The Desert" today. And came across this lovely little paragraph:

There is in the deepest center of the soul a chamber of peace where God dwells, and where, if we will only enter in and hush every other sound, we can hear His still, small voice.

These words touched me. I must remember who is Commander-in-Chief and when I am still and join in His presence; my soul will be at peace.

But, the kitchen is beckoning me now. Off to Command Central. Happy Thanksgiving!

Put Your Sparkle On!

2010-11-17T17:16:00.000-08:00

Our mantel has some sparkle to it...

The crystal candle sticks were Mom's.
The "mercury" votives inexpensive baubles from a local haunt of mine.
The bust - a "low" from Tuesday Morning a couple of years ago.
The 2 silver-like pieces - from an antique store in Tomball, Texas.
...and the pears??? Can't remember!

November brings:
Excitement for Thanksgiving.
Anticipation for gatherings at home with family & friends.

I hope you sparkle while preparing for next week!

Sunday Nights + Sofas!

2010-11-14T17:12:00.000-08:00

Ok, I'm all about keeping it real. And this is the real us on a Sunday night. We moved the sofa back down here. It's been upstairs for 5 months. I tried living with my two upholstered chairs where you see the sofa. But, honestly...we are a sofa family. I must admit I really want a new one; but this works. Workout equipment is out & about, it looks a mess. But, it's real life on Sunday night.

Sunday nights are important to us. Especially when football is on. And more so when our Cowboys are winning. My Men are die-hard fans.

I am grateful this evening. And, it's just small stuff...but it's REAL stuff.

♥ Our first fire of the season.
♥ Our first pot of chili. And it was really good....a Martha Stewart recipe
(infused with a touch of cocoa).
♥ Sunday paper strewn everywhere.
♥ Our dogs right by our side.

Fall 2010 has been our most peaceful, love-filled, harmonious in 10+ years. HEY!!!! That's why I wanted the sofa back downstairs!!! We can sit close to one another, cuddle up.
Yup, I'm talking about #2 Son cuddling.

My ♥ overflows.

My Doodle Book

2010-11-06T14:33:00.000-07:00

Seeing Red!

2010-11-05T05:30:00.000-07:00

Everywhere I turn I am seeing red. I'm not angry....I literally see red - on lips, in fashion, in homes. What caught my eye at first is the lip of J. Crew. She may be 30 years younger than I am; but red lips are a classic, right? I used to wear red lips. My now 27 year old son told me at the age of 10: "Mom, we can't go yet; you don't have your lips on!" Friends gave me grief because no matter what, I had my red lips going. And it never came off!!! (love that - I could eat a 4-course meal and still my lips were in tact).
Did you know????
- For millennia, red lipstick has been both treasured and forbidden.
- Its appeal is primal, offering a vivid shortcut to glamour.***
- The Nazi party banned lipstick as early as 1933, announcing that "women with painted faces" would not be admitted to party functions.

***with red lipstick, we are supposed to wear less eye makeup and so it is a shortcut to glamour!!!!

Those few tidbits came from this book:

Is this cover unbelievable????? And it's RED!!!! This is a Christmas gift for a certain someone; but I HAD to glance through it...and found "Red Lipstick." It's a pretty cool book....

Even after writing this post, I discovered the very topic in "Veranda" last night. There on the last page, the founder, Lisa Newsom, shares her love of the color red.

Red is in the air! And what perfect timing. I love the color orange (autumn, Thanksgiving, etc.), BUT give me Christmas. Oh, I am a Christmas girl and seeing red so prevalent gets me giddy for the holidays!!!!

It's too early to decorate for Christmas; however, I can decorate my lips. Below are some oldies that might still work.

Live Well, Laugh Hard!

2010-10-20T22:54:00.000-07:00

I can't sleep tonight yet I should be able to. My Guy is in the next room snoaring lightly; healthy and here. A dear friend is not as fortunate. Last night she and her guy were home and within maybe a two hour time span, she lost him. He passed away very suddenly. No illness; no health issues. Gone. Like. That.

Last night I could not let My Guy go. I listened to him breathe. And tonight, I wasn't sleepy but I crawled under the covers to just hug him...but I can't drift off. My heart is so heavy for my friend.

Only a month ago, I received THE perfect birthday card. It's all about laughing. She knows I love a good laugh. I thought I'd post a couple of GREAT pictures. One a few years old, the other just last week.

# 2 Son 3 years ago, ROARING at his uncle.

(This picture will be a fixture in my mind forever!)

and then just last week....I get this:

... on my cell phone!

Two friends that probably DID fall off of their chairs.

And so my wish for you is:

We simply must live in the present and my blogging friend, Linsey has a beautiful
message about doing just that.)

Live well and laugh hard my friends!!!!

Let's Just Skip 13!

2010-10-16T16:32:00.000-07:00

Spring, 1982 (Connecticut): Brothers + Half-Sis...

I had been married for five years. My brothers and I traveled from Texas to attend Dad's ~~(3rd)~~ wedding. My half-sister from Dad's wife #2 was in attendance as well.

I've told you before how very dashing Dad is. And once again he got himself a fine wife. Stepmom #2 was only 9 years older than me. She was accomplished: a fabulous interior designer, worldly, a gourmet cook, she had it all.

It started with Stepmom #1. She was the one who wore the itsy-bitsy-teeny-weeny bikini, the Bain de Soleil bod, clad in designer clothing; picture perfect. And I was 13 when they married. I really could have used a Fairy Godmother. Do you remember 13, girls? Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! No WONDER the #13 has an evil connotation! She would have said: "Don't look in the mirror with your eyes. Someday you'll appreciate your auburn hair, curly locks. You'll revel in your loud (obnoxious) laughter. Look at yourself the way God sees you!"

Fast forward....about 13 years. The wedding in '82. It was classy in a Connecticut kinda way! In their home, intimate with family and close friends. I was a grown up so no biggie that he was marrying...again. Enter Fairy Godmother: "Oh, Vava...you may not be reed thin or have your Daddy close by; BUT you are married to a man that loves you. Respects you."

Stepmom #2 and I have become dear friends over the years; but it took work on my part. The daughter-jealous of any woman-taking time away from Dad-syndrome would wax and wane.

I look back and think how silly I was. I never needed a Fairy Godmother! No matter how much or how little my earthly Dad was around my heavenly Father never left my side.

I'd like to tell all 13 year old girls that whatever they feel now, good or bad; ask their Fairy Godmother for this wish: "...please introduce me to The One." And my prayer is that it doesn't take 35 years or so to shed that 13 year old skin.

What's Hue with You?

2010-10-14T12:51:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling golden...we have a (pretty) harmonious home life going. The temp has dropped allowing me to wear my favorite clothing. Blogs are bursting with beautiful vignettes of golden pumpkins, mouth watering recipes for scones and pumpkin lattes.

And so, with a few minutes on hand I strolled through the homestead and noticed not only do I FEEL golden (aka "well"), my home has layers of golden hues. Wow!

And it makes me wonder if everyone's home is the same hue that they put on their body? Their favorite color? I was born in September, does that have a huge impact? I loved the book "September." When I was in high school I CHOSE to wear olive green (long before it was hip or cool). One friend back then remarked: "Why are you wearing army green?" We are still friends today. And I still wear muddy, army, olive green! And so does my place. With gold, copper, rusty hues. Hhhhmmmm.

Even my business card reflects my coloring (I have a really good graphics artist that "nailed me.") Am I boring...or just know what I like? I think I know what makes me feel good!

Autumn does.

Two 5-Star Fetes

2010-09-30T16:29:00.000-07:00

I'm tracking the myriad of celebrations in and around my life this fall.

Fete #2:

My Guy and I along with our cousins dined (well!) at Chef Paul's new restaurant Peli Peli for "someone's" 55th. 5 stars for sure!

Fete # 3: ...the following weekend we journeyed to Dallas. A nephew was turning 40 and The Johnson Dynasty was in town to laissez les bons temps rouler. We really could have used a family tree (or name tags) but that tree would look C-R-A-Z-Y with branches shooting off every which way. Let me introduce you to some of the characters:

One woman with her exes in attendance
One man with 4 sons from 2 women. (only 1 of his exes was there)
Two matriarchs who are at the top of the family tree; but don't really know one another. Yet they produced someone at the party. A son or grandson maybe???
A 30 year old ex-Cajun now firmly ensconsed in The Big Apple.
A transplant from the north that thinks she's a Texan
Brothers not by blood; but closer than blood
The wives of said brothers - so gorgeous you ~~(might want to scratch their face)~~ look twice
Step-brothers, step-sisters, 1/2 siblings
Baby-sitters all grown up with kids of their own
A couple of merchandising czars, shoe men, an engineer, CPA, food and beverage men and women, photographers, teachers, IT ~~geeks~~ techies, stock broker, sales reps, a financial guy...

ex-sisters-in-law, still sisters at heart. And more - I know I've missed someone!

The beauty of the evening was the love and friendship that ruled the roost! I wonder if it's normal for such a clan to gather...with all our history...and enjoy it so much! The Birthday Boy is loved by all so perhaps he and his beautiful wife set that tone. They welcomed everyone and put on a party. Just like we like 'em!

IF we were likened to food, it would have to be gumbo: a mish mash of humanity with a dash of spice and heat and oh so tasty. But what made it outstanding? Not a lick of bitterness. Time (with maturity) heals and forgiveness makes everything taste better. (Oh, and by the way, we DID have gumbo!)

Blended families are a gift and I give the evening 5 STARS!

I Kid You Not!

2010-09-23T12:00:00.000-07:00

Is it worth it?

A number of people I know are looking for jobs, beginning new careers or fulfilling their dreams. It has made me think hard on what I want to do. One thing I know! I do not want to work for a power-hungry-demeaning-rude-snide-(usually very wealthy)-know-it-all-unappreciative-cantankerous sort.

...and I've had my share of just such a boss. Boss #1 when I was 19 or 20 acted inappropriately. I screamed! My boss in Saudi Arabia, after working for him 3 years, said "Hey you - get me coffee!" While on maternity leave with Son #1, another boss had an affair with a friend I brought into the company, and then hired HER as his assistant. I kid you not.

Years ago, I thought the end-all, be-all would be to own a Louis V. handbag. A real one; not the China-town-version. And, so I got one. But I got it the hard way....

My boss was a female CEO who we'll call Dr. R. If I listed job duties they'd include: buy husband underwear, cover for her affair(s), and take verbal abuse quite regularly.  "The Devil Wears Prada" movie had a scene of Meryl trying to get on a plane in a blinding rainstorm. I lived that. On a Friday night, Dr. R. was in Florida. I was home with a bunch of girlfriends. My Guy was out of town. The phone rings and a hysterical Dr. R. screams into the phone: "Virginia, my cat is dying. You've got to get me back there!" I kid you not. No planes were leaving due to a potential hurricane. I called Hooks Airport to inquire about a private jet.  Long story short...she ran throughout the airport, catching the last flight to H-town. I had a limo awating that took her home, picked up Dying Cat...and then on a road trip to Texas A&M Vet's school. I kid you not.

She (tried) making up for "all of this" by giving great gifts. And, oh my...I accepted them. Cold hard cash, a "Louis" bag, Cole Hahn scarves (in picture w/Louis), more cash. I took it - the abuse, the gifts, the shoddy treatment.

Even before Dr. R., I worked for oil tycoon, Mr. B. It did not last long - just an hour after he threw a stapler at me. Let me set the stage. I was young(er), worn to a nub with my dying Mom, and our two sons required lots of attention. Add the commute! Traffic in Houston wears everyone to their nub.

Again, flashback to "The Devil..." movie. When Mr B. entered the office, the receptionist would buzz the first office: "He's here." They in turn buzzed on down the hall. We'd sit tall at "attention."  I was the last stop. My office guarded his.

In my supply closet was a private phone line (not connected to the oil company). I had to get in at 8:30 and listen to my to-do's for the day that he left on the recorder. Without fail, he'd call at 8:40. IF I did not pick up the phone, "Katy, bar the door!" Of course, he was checking to see if I got to work on time.

I'd been with him three months and Mom had died while I worked there. I was a door mat. Pure and simple.  One morning I allowed a gentleman to go in even though Mr. B.'s door was closed. When he left Mr. B.'s office, I was buzzed in. And then it hit. "You are a __________ idiot. Why on earth would you let someone in when my door is closed?" On & on...and bam! A flying stapler just missed me. I kid you not. I did leave that very day after being coached by my head hunter. I went in and said: "Mr. B., I'm out of here. It's obvious it's not going to work out." ....and home I went.

I've been out of the professional/corporate world for 10 years and have worked hard - on myself. If only I knew then what I know now. There is no way...no way on earth....I'd allow people to treat me in such a manner. No one should be treated less than anyone.

It's about kindness - we DO get what we give.  And instead of a Louis V bag oh, if only I had received respect!  I'd much prefer respect: with a heap of love, a spoonful of laughter, a dash of kindness and a pinch of patience.

So I'm in a fortunate stage of life...where I can sift, ponder and pray about what to do next. The missing ingredient on my many job searches was prayer. It was all about the BIG job, working for the BIG cheese, getting the BIG money. I'm so over that. Although I've got the Louis, I don't even carry it.

If I had a daughter I would tell her to pray and respect herself. I kid you not.

A Winning Weekend!

2010-09-11T09:06:00.000-07:00

I think we all like to be winners...in whatever we do, right? My Guy got up at the crack this morning to run in a local race. He's very happy with his results as noted above. And I am happy FOR him. You see, he must run. He just must. Years ago, when #1 Son was around 10, we were all in a sporting goods store. Father's Day was around the corner and boy comes running up to me: "Mom, Mom...I found the perfect shirt for Dad."

I abhor the "s" word. And my goodness, he was only 10. I ~~(tried to)~~ act offended but was won over when I realized that #1 Son "got" his Dad. Pretty cool, right?

Here is that shirt. 17 years later!!!!

....and it's still My Guy's mantra.

And so this morning, I'm thinking...what makes ME feel like a winner? I don't get trophies but I do get satisfaction from:

Deep, soul-digging talks with Sons
Gut-wrenching laughter (especially with My Guy!). Two nights ago, I almost fell out of my chair due to something he said. It drew the boys into the kitchen to see whatever WAS Mom doing?
The anticipation of bringing down fall clothes, organizing my closet.

Yup, that's it. For today....I'm feeling like a winner!

I hope our hearts race.

Our bellies ache from laughter.

The body's stretched,

Our minds at peace.

Oh to be drawn in, for talk & chatter.

Wait on someone, literally serve.

Give of ourselves - rejoice and sing!

Twirl in the kitchen,

Fix nachos for football.

Oh, how I love a winning weekend!

xoxo

I've Got That Lovin' Feeling....

2010-09-06T11:36:00.000-07:00

What goes around...

(can) come around!!!

This chinoiserie coffee table has been in Mom's life - in every living room - since I remember. In fact, the top picture is even older than I am!!! The little ole thing has been in our keeping for at least 60 years, mine for 17 since Mom died. My brothers and I were unbelievably civil and generous when splitting up her goods. Each of us have parts of Mom...that particularly appealed to us.

It's more worn or I'd say more LOVED! And means the world to me.
Is there something in your home that you treasure?

Birthday Boy (Fete #1)

2010-09-04T08:48:00.000-07:00

Last night was our first fall celebration. Since I posted on how much I love this time of year and all its' activities, I am going to keep track of every celebration. My Guy turned 56 and it was honored with the presence of his folks, cousins and St. Steve and date. We had to have a "manly-man" meal of course. Ribs by Steve, Cornbread by cousin Josie and red beans by moi. These fancy-shmancy cupcakes were a treat FROM "Treat."

The table was set....just waiting on our guests.

Oh, and #2 Son was around as well. The best birthday gift has been his attitude the last 6 weeks or so. Thank you, Lord!

Cute picture of My Guy's Dad cracking up....

Cousin Josie and #2 Son....toying with her iPad.

Birthday Guy getting his "treat." He went for the 24 Karat (that'd be carrot cake cupcake, cream cheese icing dusted with 24 K powder...

Serving his Mom....look how sweet she's looking at her boy!!!!! By the way, what IS the etiquette of eating cupcakes? That was a topic of discussion and with such frothy frosting a fork was a must!

And so it's on to a holiday, long weekend. Woo-hoo! I hope everyone of you has a treat in store for your weekend!

September Sensibilities!

2010-09-01T11:56:00.000-07:00

When I looked at my daytimer this morning and realized it's SEPTEMBER 1st, I smiled....big. Every September 1, I feel this way. It's not just because it's my birthday month and that of My Guy's birthday, my little brother's and a ton of other relatives. So many Autumn Babies are in my life. It's fall. Houston may show 90 degrees on the thermostat but in MY mind the temp is dropping...

I much prefer this day to New Year's Eve/Day. I have a skip in my step and a sense of anticipation - could be the hoopla of the holidays on the horizon. The autumn "semester" is jam packed! I mentioned a ton of birthdays. Then, the Marburger-Round Top Fall show...if ONLY Eddie and Jaithan would wend their way south. (Yes, I meant to use wend vs. wind.) Houston has The Nutcracker Market November 11 through 14th. I hope CC and I get there again! Closer to my neck of the woods is the Junior League Holiday Market in The Woodlands.

Fall colors, sweaters, and boots: oh, my! I may work myself up to that chic dark almost-black nail lacquer but today - after a relaxing, intense pedi, could only go a deep barn red. Even my toes look brand new!

September also brings our ladies Bible study together after a summer hiatus and we had a celebration last night to do just that - celebrate one another, a new study and a new season.

I hope you have a "Barnabas" in your life. We named our group The Barnabas Bunch or Buds...because this is the most encouraging group of women around. (Barnabas means "encourager.") We've met in each other's homes for over 12 years. At one time there were 20+ women in 12 different churches. We've seen graduations, funerals, illness, divorce, grandbabies, love, loss and a ton of life! I'd be lost (or in the loony bin) without them! And, uhhh...they can cook! There is never a shortage of food at our functions.

This post is all over the place - but I'm just overflowing with September sensibilities. There's "new TV" - football games (go Cowboys!). I can't wait to start my morning outdoors on my little patio .

Fires! I light a fire almost every cool morning. Thank goodness for gas logs that look real! What's better than two dogs lounging by a fire at the crack of dawn?

I think I'll hunt. For my copy of "September" by Rosamund Pilcher. I read it 20 years ago after receiving it for my (September) birthday. Cousin Josie gifted me - it really was perfect. And oh wow....it was sooooooo good!

If Eddie & Jaithan (ever) get this way, you're invited to join us at Round Top. In your jeans, boots and a sweater of course!

Do tell - what are YOUR plans for fall?

Joy-Walking!

2010-08-31T04:45:00.000-07:00

I devoured "Walking with God" by John Eldredge. As with most of my books, it's highlighted and tagged to pieces. I love making books mine with scrawling notes throughout. This is also what I call a man-book...which means the men I know reading it, like it too. It's an easy read - John Eldredge is transparent and real. I laughed out loud at his description of distracting moments. And cried when they lost their dog.

There are a lot of key points but two of his subjects oh, sort of pierced this old heart.

1. Beware of Agreements (page 57)

Most of us have bouts of oppression/depression, right?  He suggests digging into it. Figuring out why you feel cruddy helps get rid of it. The thoughts that take me under, make me feel awful are not of God. When I succumb, I've made an agreement with it (the bad thought) .

My example - I was volunteering last week - not rocket science and no payment for this work. We are volunteers. Someone asked me a question and I didn't know the answer. She, cuttingly, said: "Gosh, don't you have the instructions on this?" No biggie, right?

Well....I immediately went south with these thoughts: "She'll think I'm inadequate and tell everyone I don't know what I'm doing." The second part of my thought Mr. Eldredge calls speculation. I realize that quite often I feel sucker-punched when criticized.  I dug...and figured out why. (No need to go there now.)

I am going to stop these thoughts when they hit. I will not agree with them.  And speculating is the same as worry.  My new tool worked just the other day!  John Eldredge's wife, Stasi, has a retreat in spring 2011 in Colorado. You have to enter it through a lottery (guess a whole lot of chicks want to go!).  I almost said...."well, it'll be a miracle...blah-blah-blah." Then, bam! I stopped it! :) IF God wants me to go, I shall go! Try it. You'll like nipping speculation and negativity in the bud.

2. Making Room for Joy (page 37)

I love me some joy! "So, why don't I wake with a joyful heart today? Joy was just here. Where did it go?" (page 38). It's all those dern agrements - "...subtle convictions we come to, assent to, give way to, or are raised to assume are true."

One of my favorite Scriptures is "The joy of the Lord is your strength." (Nehemiah 8:10). And Mr. E. talks about how when he's felt joy, he's felt more alive than any other time in his life. Me too! It give me strength.

I highly recommend reading WWG. Like I said - it's an easy read yet rich in tools for our every day.

The Search for the Perfect Sofa

2010-08-27T15:47:00.000-07:00

After making myself at home in homes that had oomphy-cozy, squishy sofas, well, now I NEED one. I've tried to live without one for a few months. And I've rationalized the set up below by saying since we're (almost) empty-nesters, we do not NEED a sofa.

But football and "new" TV is about to begin and I've decided we must get cozy. I sent this picture to a very "famous" someone...and he/she answered me! Love the internet!!!! He/she suggests I get one without a skirt...that if it has legs; it'll lighten up all this furniture. As soon as he/she said it, I had to agree.

Do you know how expensive these darn things are now??? Oh, my. This Wish-List item might even spur me on to purge and have a garage sale. We have enough to purge that it might end up a really good garage sale.

And do you know how many STYLES there are? I've always been a floral gal; until now. No more chintz sofas for me - at least not in this house. My love for them goes way back. Mimi's homes always had The Perfect Chintz sofa. I grew up with a very low, long, comfortable (floral) sofa when living with Mom.

My Dad and Stepmom have a beautiful home in Connecticut and Stepmom is a fabulous designer. She has impeccable taste. The look of her home is quite different from those in Texas; but it's the look I grew up with and what I love.

Look at all that layering and luscious pattern on pattern.......mmm, mmm, mmm! Now that's a pretty sofa!

Their den is a tad less frilly:

My Stepmom has "the stuff" and it's always a feast for the eyes!!

While studying this tan sofa, I see the legs - no skirt here. Yes, I think "mine" must have legs!!!

If you would be so kind, throw in your vote for my new sofa. What say YOU?????? There is the basic, traditional, classy "Bridgewater Sofa." I can see this in our room; maybe in an off white or even a cocoa brown linen???? But no skirt....

I'll let you know if I bite the bullet! It would be nice to have one before the first official Dallas Cowboy game!

Bad Nanny!

2010-08-19T10:17:00.000-07:00

Most everyone has read "The Help." It took me around 20 hours to listen to it in the car on my recent road trip.  LOVED it.

I wasn't in the south during the civil rights movement but up east still. Mom and Dad had help. One lovely woman named Magnolia helped Mom by "watching" us and cooking. I know my brothers would agree that we ~~(they)~~ tested the help! We still laugh today recounting Magnolia Tales. She'd pick up the rotary phone and pretend to call our parents...."Ahhhhhhh, swear, children.....your parents are gonna be upset when they hear you ain't eatin' your dinner." She'd chase my brothers all over the house.

And don't forget about the butler and gardener at Mimi's. I think THEY could write a book! My word - the stories they could spin. The amount of booze put away and the hangovers suffered by the adults were a weekly event. And then the grandchildren. My confessions here will finally put to rest my angelic reputation!

My cousin and I "stole" Mimi's Mercedes one night....and slowly inched our way out the drive. We had to; otherwise that gravel I love so dearly, would have given us away!  And the two of us drove around East Hampton like we were "all that." Do you think the gardener, who also took care of the autos, didn't know the car went out the night before? Yet he didn't tattle.

The first time I got sick from imbibing was at Mimi's. I was tucked and stuffed into beautiful, crisp, WHITE sheets and morning hit me. Hard. Needless to say, the white sheets were no more. All I could think was that I HAD to hide this mess from Mimi. That poor maid! Dis-gus-ting. And she didn't tattle. It was another era - the help was respectful and quiet.

Now, fast forward to 1990. We had a 7 year old son and a newborn. I worked full time and we thought it wise to try a "live-in." I went through an agency for heaven's sake. They presented a (too) pretty blonde-ish young lady, I think around 20. Hhhhmmmrpppph. But I was desperate and all seemed legit.

She liked her wine and wasn't bright enough to get rid of the evidence. We found a garbage bag full of empties in the attic. One night I took a call for her. He said she had applied for a job and he wouldn't leave a message. Even 20 years ago we had caller I.D. I called that number right back.  A strip joint. My "nanny" was a future stripper.

Where HAD the good help gone?

Panhandle Pretties

2010-08-17T17:25:00.000-07:00

What a delight to find a "Welcome Vava" sign after a ten hour drive through Texas. This is my beautiful sister-in-law's beautiful front porch. Some might wonder why I "vacay" in the Panhandle of Texas but I've learned it's the PEOPLE not the place. I'd truly rather be in Dullsville, U.S.A. with fun, upbeat folks over Paris, France with snooty snobs.

When I walked into their kitchen my first morning, I found this darling set up:

THE perfect cup for my morning jo AND a Hedley peach: scrumptious. All on a silver platter with a linen napkin. Well, of course!

The prettiest part of the trip were the peeps!

Pals still, after 43 years!
A long-lost 1st cousin, she with a beautiful heart & soul and her handsome son
A Nephew and His Harem
Kind neighbors of my hosts
Friends of P's.
A Cowboy friend who helped a few of us feel like "Stars" while twirling us around.
The most loveable hosts around: G&P!

And then...

No traffic.
Red wine.
Great salads.
Coffee and fruits.
Lime beer and Cheetos.
Stuffed shells and a movie.
Grilled burgers by Jeff.
And shopping.
Dancing and laughing.
No traffic.
Frank's Chicken Sandwich.
Rearranging and fluffing.
Fish tacos and margs.
Did I say laughing? And no traffic?

These are a few of my favorite things...in Amarillo.

And I'll take 'em wherever I can get them! Every time I go there I come home refreshed and thankful for family and friends who put me up AND put up with me!

The Look of Love: Booze, Bikinis & Bacharach

2010-08-06T14:25:00.000-07:00

(thanks to my friends that push me to spin yarns about my upbringing...)

I claim to be a Texan but it all started long, long ago in Connecticut. Life in the '60s in an affluent town up east left an imprint that I can't shake. I suppose had I continued living that life it would be ho-hum and nothing to write about. When transported to the panhandle of Texas via a Mustang convertible, a single mom and two brothers from a rather privileged life..there are stories.

There was a season after the divorce before the move south where Mom, Brothers and I downsized and moved into the town. We were "townies." I was traumatized. Dashing Dad pretty much now The Weekender Dad. A much smaller home. Mom went to work! We went to public school.

Dad worked on Wall Street - a very buttoned up profession. TGIF had extra power in the swinging '60s with the event of The Weekend House. Dad and several bachelors rented a pad, usually near water. Rowayton, Stamford, Norwalk. And every other weekend three spoiled, mischevious children descended on The Weekend House.

Booze, bikinis, Bacharach. That was the scene. Throw us in the mix...I have to give Dad credit. He handled it really well.

This next bit is "for girls only." Gentlemen readers, if there are any, may want to skip this tale.

Women were all over, honestly, the place was a grown up version of a frat house. I was enthralled by these younger-than-mom, bikini-clad beauties. I'd lock myself in the bathroom and scope out cosmetics and such. And so while IN that bathroom one Saturday, Mother Nature decided to come a-calling. Dear old Dad took me into town and parked in front of the pharmacy. He told me what to purchase. I simply could not take my 11 year old, insecure, frizzy red-headed self in there. And in he went.

Yup. Dad did the deal. I don't know if he'd remember this story; but a daughter will never forget.

Soon after the divorce Dad remarried. Burt Bacharach was singing "The Look of Love" and "This Guy's in Love with You." She didn't stand a chance - between the music and Dashing Dad! And talk about bikinis. My stepmother wore one better than most! And I wore the color green. I was 12, she was 24. I was frumpy, she was glam! She had Dad's...heart and attention.

And it was then that Mom swept us away in her yellow Mustang perhaps with yet another Bacharach tune in the background. She might have sung the words to "I'll Say a Little Prayer for You."

Many years later I learned Mom never stopped loving Dad...and Burt's lyrics probably seared her to the core:

My darling, believe me

For me there is no one but you

Please love me too

Booze and bikinis? Who needs them? Not so the look of love. Whether it's between Dads and Daughters, Mothers and Sons, A Husband and Wife, Parents and Kids. I {{{LOVE}}} love - it's grand!

The Restless Life Syndrome**

2010-08-05T13:42:00.000-07:00

Mid-life. 55. Empty Nest. Some ponder, stew and fret. I'm fret-free a lot. If I do begin fretting; I know know how to release it. However, it is time for a change. There! I've said it out loud. "I'm restless...I need to do something." Yikes. It's out there now. Kids are ~~(supposed to be)~~ gone, and thankfully I'm not glued to the phone for calls from the principal anymore.

For some of "us" this is a time of travel, R and R but we're not there...yet. All in due time. Well, not DUE time...His time. I'm trying to listen to God. Walk with God. In fact, My Guy and I are reading "Walking with God" by John Eldredge. As is always the case God has a theme running through the everyday. Handpicked for moi. While AT home, I'm to be quiet. And listen. Pay attention and when distracted, get still and quiet. I spent a good part of the early morning reading said book, then snippets from older saints, the Bible, praying, trying to listen...
I have a Doodle Book (that's my name BUT an idea from Tracy Porter) where I write quotes, "aha" ideas, beautiful pictures from magazines of dream destinations or a favorite photo. I include Scripture that speaks to the moment. Ya know - a girly-doodle-book. I opened it today after reading WWG, and doodled away.

I made a list of my talents (whoa, why do so many of us have difficulty with that?). It seems these talents (or natural affinities) should match up with my next career. The best part about this stage in life is that I don't have to go back to work. I want to. So why not "do" something I love, enjoy and am good at? Ahhhh, but I am "of a certain age" - almost the 55. Am I hire-able?

Well, who knows? Oh, yes...God knows. So when I left the quiet this morning, I knew my mission: it's to seek Him first then be open (receptive). I do love a good adventure - remember Vava doesn't do boring.

So let me know if you have ideas for my mid-life-crisis-calling.**

I'll keep y'all posted!

Readin', Writin' (No Arithmetic!)

2010-07-31T13:58:00.000-07:00

Writin': on the inside cover of a cookbook (below) to my Mom from her sister-in-law, (my) Aunt Bobbie.

Readin': We wouldn't DARE give this for a gift these days. It's all about healthy...

...and inside this book was a hand-written recipe of Mom's.

So! Do you notice anything???

Their handwriting is quite similar.

My stepmother's looks like this too.

I call it "Boarding School Script."

A lot of women I know that were brought up on the East Coast have this roundish, delightful penmanship.

To my current East Coast Friends:

Do you?

(A man's penmanship is an unfailing index of his character, moral and mental, and a criterion by which to judge his peculiarities of taste and sentiments.) -Philip Dormer Stanhope

Celebrate Good Times...

2010-07-30T17:49:00.000-07:00

(The backyard at 7:30 pm)

C'mon!

Friday evenings may be my favorite time of the week.
My Guy loves weekends (i.e., AWAY from work) and we've always celebrated our weekends.

Tonight is different. We're not going on a date but are putzing around the home and in the garden.
He and #2 Son worked in the backyard while I worked INside. It's very rewarding - team work.
I am most thankful for the past week. And celebrating by dancing around the house to my music.
(Thank goodness the guys were outdoors....no one witnessed such folly!)

So I lift my glass to YOU! Here's to a weekend of rest, joy, and being on the same team...
(with whomever you're celebrating life with!)

His Story

2010-07-28T13:22:00.000-07:00

(Heart-felt words from #2 Son at 20 years old)

The Lost Man's Prayer

I'm sorry...sorry for all the pain.
I never meant to drive this family insane.
We always strived for better, for more to gain...
All the energy we had is gone, down the drain.

Down the gutter.
I didn't mean to curse out my mother.
And for my father, those words I never meant to utter.
Every day I wonder what life would be like if there was no thunder - throughout this family.
Would I be smarter or dumber, would I still to this day be by my Dad's side as a runner?

Would I look forward to each and every summer? Is it possible that I would wake up feelin younger?
...with no stress or is it all a test...from God, where life is a challenge and you have to figure it out like chess?

Yes, my whole life has been a mess.
But please don't give up, we will all make it, Wes.
This is all for the best, soon we will figure out what I was doing wrong.
We won't have to guess and from then on we will do good.
Just like we should.

My whole life I have felt misunderstood, but family, we will be okay.
As long as every day I cross my hands and pray. Amen.

(June 23, 2010)

What goes around...

2010-07-23T11:12:00.000-07:00

July 1956

...Comes Around!

Dad's ensemble would still fit in today AND how I'd love that handbag!

(#1 Son resembles Dad so much, it's eerie!)

A Heavenly Haven

2010-07-17T07:17:00.000-07:00

I'm having a moment. I was sitting in bed; piled high with all my books - intent on journaling, meditating, soul searching...and then I hear it. The mourning dove's coo. And tears stream down my face. Not sad tears. I'd call them tears of gratitude.

The "coo" is one of three sounds that instantly transport me back - to summers in Long Island. I've mentioned the crunch of gravel and then there's the whistle of a train.

I closed my eyes and crawled deeper into my nest of ironed, crisp, luxurious sheets. The window is open and I hear someone walking the driveway. It's probably the gardener. He walks the grounds, babying the roses and dressing them for the day. He snips a few for Mimi's breakfast tray and various vignettes around the house.

It dawns on me how summers there were not only vacation but a much needed respite (def.: "an interval of rest or relief"). As a young girl I knew I needed it. Craved it. But NOW I know....it was a relief. Such a relief to flee from the tension I felt at home. This is my perception - my memory. Recently, one of my brothers and I reminisced and learned we had varying and VERY different perceptions of our childhood.

Thankfully we stopped before the hurts hurt more but I should have said how dare you? How dare you tell me what to think, or what to remember. I know what I know:

Getting away from home was heaven. Summer at Mimi's was a haven.

A 9 or a 10!

2010-07-17T06:23:00.000-07:00

Me, Dad, #1 Son and Mimi, oh about 20 years ago...

Even on a casual weekend...my Mimi

"dressed to the nines."

Lipstick: check

Manicured nails: check

Immaculately coiffed: check

Classic jewelry: check

"Dressed to the nines" origin is unknown but may be a reference of scale. Who IS a 10? In my mind Mimi came close. She certainly was a good role model!

I hope your daughters are blessed to sit at an older woman's feet. SO MUCH LIFE there!

Boys Will Be Boys!

2010-07-12T09:09:00.000-07:00

Two heads are better than one. Brother #2 just called and we reminisced of "days gone by." I was laughing my head off at his memories. Below is an email of his:

I remember Brother #1 and I being banished to the servants quarters over the garage (the greatest punishment EVER), being driven to "The Club" every morning, and killing dozens and dozens of cotton tailed rabbits on Mimi's front lawn. I also remember the Sun Room and you forgot the hand rolled butter balls.

Miriam, The Cook, had two paddles that she'd roll to make the perfect butter ball. Brother asked: "Why do you do that?" The answer: "Your grandmother prefers her butter this way."

Our dad hunted. He had two sons and thought they'd like pellet guns. One morning both my brothers went a-hunting. Brother #2 recalls nabbing 50 bunnies. And then Mimi and her bridge group returned for lunch. Needless to say she was furious. Dad tried not to laugh. And you wonder why they weren't allowed to stay in the main house?

The three of us had breakfast in the kitchen. At the same time every morning, the buzzer (The Annunciator Box) would sound (loudly) in the kitchen. Said buzz announced Mimi was ready for her breakfast. Miriam prepared the tray - and it looked precisely the same every morning. A plate of toast, sliced on the diagonal, covered with a silver cloche. There was a vase with a single bud, coffee and freshly squeezed orange juice. And up the stairs, Nester would go.

...and then it was our turn. We'd go in to pay our respects to Mimi. Brother #2 says it was much like paying tribute to The Queen. The Boys were not "allowed" to linger. "Boys, the car is waiting." ...and down the stairs they'd go. Nester drove them to "The Club."

Butlers? Who Needs Them?

2010-07-11T11:47:00.000-07:00

Nester. Hearing his name makes me stand taller. Nester was Mimi's butler and he stood tall with perfect posture. Just as you envision The Perfect Butler. His wife, Miriam, was The Cook. Mimi and Eddie (her 2nd husband, our step-grandfather) lived the summers in Long Island. We made the pilgramage to The Hamptons every summer when I was a child. If memory serves me correctly I went through my 16th year.

As mentioned in a previous post, Brother is working on our family tree. (I've dubbed him The Research King). In his surfing, he unearthed a blurry photo of Mimi's home on Further Lane. When I looked at it; memories flooded every fiber of my being...and I just had to blog about it.

Do YOU have a place - a memory - that when you think of it - you have to be still? And go there...day dream. I do. It's here...at Mimi's.

I've a love of gravel crunching. The driveway was long....and deliciously crunched under the wheels of our (always) slow approach to the house. It seems we'd turn in the drive; and the cares of life would ooze on out. Summers were slow. Intentional.

Nester would greet us in a very proper way. So different from ME if you were to ring MY doorbell. I'd scream "woo-hoo, you're here. Come on in." Nester: "Welcome. Please do come in."

Another love of mine is The Cocktail. For me, it's more the "word" than the drink. I just love saying: "Let's have a cocktail." "Shall we meet in the lobby for cocktails?" Back then, Nester would announce: "Cocktails shall be served in the library at 7 o'clock."

My Brothers and I were under age but were invited anyway. For Ginger Ale. Most often I'd sit on the floor so my view was of a silver tray as an extension of Nester's arm. Beautiful glasses of amber "liquid" tinkling with ice. To this day that vision takes me back. I was bent on sitting by "the secret drawer." Mimi kept it stocked with Life Savers. The Brothers and I always had lovely breath. And then... "Dinner is served." The grown-ups would move to the very formal dining room and the three of us were relegated to the kitchen with Miriam and Nester. After our dinner, we'd move to their TV room and watch a little Bonanza, Hazel or My Three Sons.

There was one dinner I won't forget. We were invited to join them in the dining room. Nester brought us "finger bowls" between courses. You do know about finger bowls, don't you? Well, at that age we did not. One of us (????) brought the bowl to our lips for a drink. So not the thing to do. I tell that story today in my etiquette classes. It usually brings a giggle. I don't think Mimi and Eddie giggled.

My summers were filled with life lessons. Mimi was my biggest fan and took it upon herself to mentor me. I loved every single minute I spent with her. She's the one that told me to (only) marry for love & laughter. I did. She always had a book in her hand - told me reading could be as good as any education. I am surrounded by books. Her home was layered with treasures...that meant something to her. Mine is too. I'll never have a streamlined, uncluttered home.

(Fall '78 or '79. I was newly married to My Guy. He and Mimi met. It was a beautiful thing.)

And so while we're still climbing our family tree nostalgic and wonderful memories bombard me. I just had to tell you about a few. It enforces my desire for my family to have (good) memories. Thirty years from now, at 84...my boys can read my blog. I hope they'll have fond and loving memories of My Guy and me.

I don't have a Nester but ummm, My Guy is pretty amazing around the house. We don't have a chateau in The Hamptons but our home is filled with love. I'll take My Guy in the Texas suburbs anytime and am grateful for enduring, loving memories of days gone by.

Glue Guns are a Girl's Best Friend!

2010-07-09T18:21:00.000-07:00

Blogging has replaced my many ~~(now deceased)~~ shelter magazine subscriptions. While surfing, I ventured to the exotic resort of India Hicks. Several fun "musts" of hers ended up on my list.

I do believe my toes might sport turquoise soon. Essie's, Turquoise & Caicos put a smile on my face. Note, FACE...not the toes...yet.

And then Ms. Hicks and I have something in common: a printer's tray. How many of us had these in the '70s or '80s filled with country kitsch??? Check hers out here. Mine is above.

I'm the least crafty crafter around; but containers filled with shells and a glue gun, voila! The coolest part about my shells is that they mean something. I collected every one of them...some on a beach in Saudi Arabia about 30 years ago, others from my favorite beach in Long Island. Turkey. Galveston. The sand dollars were a gift from a friend in the Carolinas.

It's really fun to repurpose - now to find a place to hang it.

Hope this weekend brings a bit of joy to each of you!

xoxo

Fun on the Fourth!

2010-07-03T06:18:00.000-07:00

Bare feet, boating, fun and fish = Fourth of July!

Happy 4th!

xoxo

10 Things I Can't Live Without

2010-06-30T07:14:00.000-07:00

coffee. I'm just sayin...it's important. My Toddy puts a smile on my face.
My computer is ~~(too much)~~ a part of my morning routine. I choose to read my favorite blogs instead of watching the news. (and so this morning, while reading V&L who guested on La Doce Vita...I came up with my list here. The blogging world is so-very-connected.)
The human touch. A hug from My Guy or a son. A big, crushing one is best.
A few products**

MAC Strobe Cream
Yves Saint Laurent Touche Eclat
Mineral make-up stuff from a Houston resource

Almost-daily-calls to a certain friend(s)
Laughter - if I haven't laughed for a certain period of time, I tell My Guy he must make me laugh.
Movies - a love of ours - My Guy and I hit one almost every Friday night. Or rent one.
Fluffing (i.e., moving furniture, rearranging, changing out a vignette....)
Bible study with the most loving, accepting women...on earth!
Books - fiction, decorating, self-help, spiritual

** My name is Vava and I am a product junkie. However, the older I get, the braver I get...and venture outside the home with far less on (product-wise) than I used to. The items on this list are my go-to for a minimalist look. Please do not look (ever!) in my bathroom drawers.

What about you? What floats your boat? Makes you giddy? What can't you live without?

Bonjour Y'all!

2010-06-26T15:30:00.000-07:00

It's good for a girl to (periodically) indulge! And so, a friend and I took a road trip! Not far, just into town...but believe me when one lives in the 'burbs and travels inside the loop, one calls it a road trip!

We hit the "Mini Design Flea" this morning. Then needed to indulge in a strong cuppa. We stopped at a delightful coffee house for a rest with a cool, jazzy band serenading us. I told her I felt like I was on vacation. It is one of the best things about Houston. There is something for everyone. And, so we declared it a Vacation Day. We are going to indulge!

A favorite of ours IS Indulge. It's a touch of France in Texas!

The owner, Cynthia, writes a delightful blog - it's a fun and informative read. One of her must haves is "Vrai." We slathered on the tiniest bit from the tester...and had to. Indulge. It's a concoction of sheabutter, peach milk, cotton oil, oats and glycerin. C'mon. WHO could resist? Also a great stop for hostess gifts...and the perfect something for the person who has it all.

While tootling around town, we happened down Ferndale. Tell me, is this France OR Houston?

There was a bit of sensory overload at Kuhl-Linscomb after a while....but not before I snapped "Cool" CC in THE cutest garage sale/flea market attire E-V-E-R!

There was another retailer that's always on our in-town tour before we bid you adieu...

I had to. Indulge. They are NEVER on sale. And they were...

Nothing like girl-time! It does a body good!

And as the French would say....

SO LONG FOR NOW...

XOXO

English Endeavors

2010-06-21T06:55:00.000-07:00

My brother is finding GREAT info on the ole family tree. The article below was written on...

Wednesday, March 3, 1896.

Question: WHEN did we stop writing - talking like this? I think our ancestors would

frown on the English language today...

"While the family of Israel Tuttle of 484 Bedford Avenue, Brooklyn, were taking dinner shortly after 7 o'clock last night, Frank Tuttle heard a noise up stairs in the parlor, which sounded as if some one was endeavoring to force the window, and he left the dining room to see what was the matter...

The affair created great excitement in the neighborhood."

(in its entirety here...)

Do thiefs today "endeavor to force the window?" And robberies create excitement? LOL!

In reading this article, I would disagree with the saying:

"We've come a long way baby." Instead...we've gone by the wayside. BUT! It sure makes fun reading!

We're Coming to America...

2010-06-16T12:43:00.000-07:00

Here's more, Kelly. Just for you...

Puritans who crossed the Atlantic on "The Planter" in 1635 and produced in America: a farmer, a "proprietor" of New Haven, Connecticut, coal company employee, a philanderer, poet, hat maker, pastor, barrel maker, banker, merchant and an ax murderer or two. These are just a few of my ancestors. And I quote:

"It was Benjamin who was to mark his family's name in history in 1677 with that rather indelicate instrument, the ax." **

The verdict...in Olde English:

"Wee, the Juary, doe declare that the decklaratshon of the

boy and the gurl as above was declared befor us by them, and doe Judg that the wund one her heed was the caus of her death, as witnes our hands."

"What makes Benjamin's action even more unusual is that his sister Mercy would, fourteen years later, kill...." ** (it's just too morbid to tell!)

And another infamous relative! Can you figure out his name?

He killed Alexander Hamilton, in probably the most famous duel in history, on July 11, 1804 at Weehauken New Jersey.

(Records are available to researchers at your State Archives). ** Connecticut State Archives

Several in one family were killed by Indians at the massacre of Dover in 1689...

I've mentioned I don't like boring. Well! I see where THAT comes from.

And then I rather like a description of Esther:

"Her religion did not cast a gloom over her mind and made her cheerful and happy, and rendered the thought of death transporting."

Life has got to be lived -- that's all there is to it.

(Eleanor Roosevelt)

Ezra's Girl!

2010-06-14T07:55:00.000-07:00

Ezra might have started his morning in a setting such as this:

A bit dreary, no modern conveniences...

I've just recently "met" Ezra Benjamin Tuttle. My brother started researching our ancestry and oh, my....can one get ~~(sucked in)~~ lost for hours when doing so! Just ask me what I did yesterday. I've always loved history and now I can read about my very own!!!

As a kid, it's pretty normal to think you're adopted - I went through that stage. And then as I grew older I just felt like I was the odd ball in the family. My Dad is the dashing-Yale educated-great hunter & fisherman-world traveler-somewhat-removed-type of father. I've mentioned both Mom and Dad here. Mom and I were as different as two women could be.

And then I have two brothers...that are much like Dad. I love them dearly; but boys will be boys.

They fish. I fluff.

And there's the "religion" thing. That's what they call it anyway. I stand pretty much alone in my belief in God. Not my immediate family; but relatives up and down the family tree. My Mimi was a staunch Catholic and talked about love and life. And then I believe an aunt is a believer....but I've never known

much else about anyone else.

Until I met Ezra yesterday.

Ezra Benjamin Tuttle, b. 1834 - Great, great, great grandfather

And I now I feel connected. Genetics are interesting. For example - in this research I also ran across the dark side of my family. Perhaps that will be another post. Today, I am focusing on the good. The connection that made me tear up this morning....at MY desk.

Wonder if Grandpa Ezra would like an iPhone? Nah....BUT!

He was 40 years old when my favorite "My Utmost for His Highest" was compiled. And I have a feeling he may have read it.

Here are some excerpts from an article about dear Ezra:

"Mr. Tuttle is a man of sterling qualities, without ostentation, in spirit genial, considerate and sincere; in MANNERS quiet but courteous."

It really threw me that manners were even mentioned. See what I mean about connection? And I learned he was on the board of the American Bible Society, trustee of Drew Theological Seminary, a member of the Missionary Society of the Methodist Church....

Methodist! In the TUTTLE family? Eeegads. LOL! After marrying My Guy I became a Methodist. Wouldn't Grandpa Ezra be happy?

We were born 121 years apart from one another but I love the man. And I will get to see him in heaven. What a reunion!

If you haven't climbed YOUR family tree you might want to. It's tons of fun!

PUSH ME!

2010-06-08T19:57:00.000-07:00

I am so not a jock. Don't have an athletic bone in this bod. So....when I push myself enough to feel endorphins flying; well, I rather like it! Have you tried spinning? Oh my gosh-it may be one of the toughest things I've attempted.

This morning I returned to the dreaded cycling room after a bit of a reprieve. But, thanks to my pastor (see previous post), I am ~~(attempting)~~ focusing. I'm paying attention to what I'm paying attention to. Don't get excited - it's only been two days.

I was spinning my wheels, literally, and thought I might croak on an indoor bike!!! And then I got my second wind and made the hour. I cycled as hard as I could at the end. Eyes closed...and actually talking to God: "Lord, help me make it. Oh, if I can do this, it'll be a miracle."

It dawned on me that a lot of women I know don't push themselves to their limit. And girlfriends...I'm at the top of that list. But...with the ole 55 coming up this fall I am feeling rather

Helen Reddy-ish. I am woman. Hear me R-O-A-R!!!!!!!! Who says that an almost 55 year old cannot be fit, strong and feel great!?

I would love it if a few of my blogging buddies would join me. Let's challenge one another. Talk about it on your blog(s) and know that it shall not be considered bragging. Tell us what YOU do...I know Morning T runs; half marathons! She's already pushing herself.

Join me...push me...and I'll push you. Isn't that what friends do?

Can I hear a big WOO-HOO?

FOCUS!

2010-06-06T12:51:00.000-07:00

"FOCUS DETERMINES GROWTH"

Getting ready to have six couples over. We're going to go through "Walking with God" by John Eldredge! Can't wait....so of course, since I'm down to the wire, I'm focused. Fluffing and spritzing. Thought these pink peonies play up The Pink Lady by Artist quite nicely...

Any-hoo...I've mentioned we have a church home. I walk in and never want to leave. In fact, #1 Son once asked me "wazzup with this place?" He said he could FEEL 'something' when he visits. More often than not, I receive exactly the Rx I need! Could be the sermon, a word from just the right person

at just the right time...

"FOCUS DETERMINES GROWTH"

Our pastor suggested we write that down this morning. And IT was what I needed! I've been so scattered recently. So badly that I haven't exercised (regularly) in a loooooonnng time, haven't had my quiet time in the morning, don't sleep well. It shows.

His words today were so relevant I wanted to share.

"We've got to pay attention to what we're paying attention to." Where we place our energy, so goes our heart. A slap in the face (for me) was: "Even good things (can) leave no room for God."

- Gotta put my house together

- Gotta organize this mess

- Gotta work in the yard

-Gotta take my in laws to the doc

Gotta, gotta, gotta. I am THE best at rationalizing how my time is spent. Yet, I AM SPENT. I've not been my best lately. And all those things are good. They are fine; however, I know I've been missing something. The RIGHT focus. And this post is for ME....sort of an accountability thing so thanks for bearing with me.

FOCUS, VAVA. It determines growth. Yes, spiritually, but business-wise, health-wise.

And finally...."Don't compartmentalize life." God is - or should be - in it all.

...and how funny is it that Dionne Warwick is on Sirrius singing "I'll Say a Little Prayer for You."

Please do! :)

What Are You Certain Of?

2010-06-02T08:03:00.000-07:00

Right when we were having this done (installing new flooring...) #2 Son pops back into our life. "He's baaccccccccccccckkkkk." And yes, this time I'm in agreement with My Guy. I know I'll have more than a few who disagree with our choice. But! Come walk in our shoes....for just a day. This young man is so down and out and on top of his wrong choices; add learning disabilties. What's a person to do?

Now, #2 Son has had a firm foundation: parents who love him. Parents together (and still goo-goo) after 33 years. A church home. Where I'm going with this is...sometimes it just doesn't matter WHAT type of parent you are. Now, many of my friends did it right. Their kids are very successful and their growing up years were not dramatic, tragic or even troublesome. However, I am certain that sometimes a raging alcoholic can parent the Valedictorian. The preacher can raise a crack head. Just because you look a "certain" way, live in a "certain" home, drive a "certain" car...nothing, nada in life is CERTAIN!

And so...while the work was going on; a friend suggested the new flooring could be a metaphor. Someone else writes of the spiritual connections in our home. I like this idea; and so I tootled around to catch more metaphors. I use a lot of "risers." It's a decorating trick, you know. You can't just plop things down. There's got to be interest....use risers - books, pedestals, whatever you can.

(My favorite riser: books; especially old....)

My prayer is for #2 Son to rise - out of his pit! My Guy and I read an article recently about Derek Steele. This "YouTube" will rock your world! He's written a book "Addict at 10..." His story is nothing short of a miracle. He ends this video: "...with as many (chances) as it takes to get it right." That hit me like a brick. I'm buying his book today. Won't use IT as a riser; but perhaps I can get it into the hands of my son and it will help him...rise. 19. The world (could be) open for the taking. Yet, our boy's foundation is oh so uncertain. Good friends and family know everything....I'm pretty much an open book. But, on this blog, I'm keeping some of his "stuff" private. Suffice it to say; today - his future is bleak. He cannot see...

(find the "risers")

...the light at the end of the tunnel. Yet, he's got a Mom and Dad who love him. Who allow him a home to live in (as long as he adheres to "certain" rules).

Mother's instincts are quite often spot on. In my gut, I know this is right. For today. Which takes me to the train of thought I am certain of. Sitting on my desk in front of me is "Calm My Anxious Heart" by Linda Dillow. I've read and reread it; hightlighted many passages. A quote from George MacDonald will certainly help me today:

"It has been well said that no man ever sank under the burden of the day. It's when tomorrow's burden is added to the burden of today that the weight is more than a man can bear. Never load yourselves so, my friends. If you find yourselves so loaded, at least remember this: it is your own doing, not God's. He begs you to leave the future to Him and to mind the present."

The moral of this post: tile floors are easy living and living one day at a time is the only way to go. I am certain of that!

xoxo

Hurricanes of Life!

2010-05-27T07:46:00.000-07:00

Above mess caused by a hole in the roof and ceiling (see picture below).

Day 1 apres Hurricane Ike

I like change. I really do. LOVE construction, rearranging furniture (often). I really should have gone into design work because it floats my boat. As the illustrious Stephen Drucker (ex-editor of House Beautiful) said: "I can't help myself." However, IKE rather forced us to redo.

So that was 2.5 years ago: big, BAD storm!

2006 - 2008

We may have been living with "builder's beige and cruddy carpet" BUT...

this was a calm season in life...lovely memories.)

September 13, 2008

#2 ~~(Stormy)~~ Son and I enjoying a stunning sunset. 9 days without electricity!

And so we had a mess after the hurricane and "got" to recarpet and paint. Our home ended up prettier, thanks to Ike! I'd call it a silver lining.

We turned to Sherwin Williams Restrained Gold and wiped out that "builder's beige." Also bit the bullet for an upgraded carpet..gold with a cream trellis. I {{{LOVED}}} it.

If we didn't have enough going on, we adopted Duke. He was rescued from the storm down in Galveston that was really slammed by Ike.

Our first meeting....love at first sight.

We were in the middle of the remodel and BEFORE that good carpet was laid, my boy Duke, ummmm.....ruined the (entire) dining room carpet. If you catch my drift. A storm within a storm. A traumatized dog adjusting to a new home going through a mess of construction. L-O-V-E-L-Y.

We actually got through the redo quickly and without (a lot) of pain. Thank goodness for St. Steve who had an "in" with the contractors. That guy, Steve!

Two and a half years later, we are ripping OUT the carpet downstairs. I told you I like change. My dogs (note: 'my.' My Guy doesn't claim them at times) have ruined it! Stains yes...but also their claws tore the carpet up, literally. Thanks to a baby gate, Duke & Stella are not allowed up stairs; so pretty carpet remains there.

And today:

A mess.

A BIG mess. We're even ripping out the hardwood in the foyer. The 18" square tile that's in our kitchen is being laid as I speak. This particular tile would not be my first choice had we built the home. BUT already I can tell it's what we need. No more patchwork (i.e., hardwood, carpet, tile). One smooth floor...a constant throughout. Plus - it's dog friendly!

In the middle of this mess; a BIGGER mess interrupted. Yes, it has to do with (Stormy) #2 Son. I'm just glad I get to rearrange my home over the long weekend. It'll take my mind off a storm brewing...too close to heart and home.

I hope that your life is calm,

no storms on the horizons.

Or if you need a distraction; just rearrange some furniture!

Pick a Poppy!

2010-05-21T02:48:00.000-07:00

There's a GREAT give-away at Short Southern Momma and it involves something in the picture above! If you haven't visited Emersonmade, go. You will then HAVE to pick a flower. :)

Pinning my red poppy on ANYTHING brings a smile to my face and most always gets a comment.

Go.

What Path are You Taking?

2010-05-20T09:36:00.000-07:00

The path of least resistance. That's all I knew...until "googling" to find out more. Per H.G. Wells: "The path of least resistance is the path of the loser." I certainly don't want to be one of those! And that path would have consisted of wallowing in a pity party.

One of my go-to books is "Utmost for His Highest" by Oswald Chambers. Mr. Chambers often nails me it!

We have to take ourselves by the scruff of the neck and shake ourselves, and we will find that we can do what we said

we could not. The curse with most of us is that we won’t. The Christian life is one of incarnate spiritual pluck.

I've mentioned before how helpful it's been for me to praise even at times when it's nearly impossible. Strong Christian friends, friends of The Most Positive Aura spout "eyes up" - rewallpaper your mind, ya da ya da ya da.

Well, Mr. Chambers is telling me the very same. I took heed this morning and got outside, which got ME outside myself. No pity party today!

It's really crazy how singing loudly, reading an uplifting page or two, a bit of exercise transforms me. What is the Rx for your soul?

Why Indeed?

2010-05-19T04:49:00.000-07:00

A week ago my heart & soul were ripped open once again. I buried myself under the covers and let it out. And had to ask "W-H-Y"?
On a good day if you were to meet #2 Son, you might think him handsome and somewhat charming. He certainly can be. But underneath that almost-20-year-old skin bubbles pain, such pain. And he finds it frustrating. This life of his.

If he'd own his diagnosis, take meds, seek counseling he'd be able to cope. Instead he barrels through his day making unwise choices.

It's sad to think about my baby...out on the streets, sleeping in some dude's car. My imagination takes me to dark places sometimes; and I have to force myself to stop. And pray. All I can do is pray for him. For years, I've prayed a radical prayer for both sons: "Lord, do whatever it takes to get them on their knees." Well the WHATEVER is pretty scary. It seems clear to me. Stop doing what you're doing. Get a plan.

And then I recall it's been this way for years. It's not that he's JUST a rebellious teen, or JUST a party animal, or JUST a boy with tons of anger, or JUST a guy with learning disabilities. He is all of this. And more. He's tasted walking with God. He's a sensitive soul. He's hysterical. He's loving. That's my boy.

I have certain pictures of #2 Son that I cling to. I've seen him at his best. My prayer is that he makes it back there - to his best.

Yet I'm not alone ~~(at all)~~ in the heartache department. Early morning, while sipping on my French roast I visit Denton Sanatorium. My heart nearly explodes. The blogging world connects hearts in the most amazing way. Please visit Jen, read her story and pray for her...and her beautiful family.)

And, so...like Jen, I ask why? Why indeed?

Urban Market Recap

2010-05-16T14:48:00.000-07:00

My purchases: an English coffee canister & 2 tiny books!

It was SUCH fun!!!! Even if in the middle of a mud field-swamp-land! It gave me an excuse to dress down: ha! I mean really----the women who DRESSED must have lost their minds. My friend and I saw a young lady exit her car in the cutest sundress with silver sandals. BIG mistake.

This is how one should dress for Urban Market. Not caring ~~(at all)~~ about making any Best Dressed List. Most wore rubber boots: polka dot, floral, animal print, Wellies. It was a wild-attire day.

The "flying saucer" on my head was a purchase to ward off the sun. It was scorching hot. Here we were. In a field. And shopowners had gor-jus vignettes wooing us into their tents.

After I cool off, I'm running outdoors to pick up sticks...then stick 'em in my glass of shells. Cool, don't ya think?

On our way out, picked up lunch-to-go, "Best Pimiento Sandwich" in Houston. I'd have to agree! Mmm, mmm good.

It was a FUN day and most definitely will be an

annual outing.

XOXO

Day Dreaming...

2010-05-15T12:15:00.000-07:00

(Off with the candles, top with boxwoods...)

I'm chomping at the bit...to go to the local garden center to personalize my yard. Don't know about you...but HERE in The Land of Subdivisions, homes look very much alike or at least like distant cousins. I can't stand it. Yet it's not in our budget to go off, buy acreage, build my dream home.

Therefore, I feel the urge to do my "thang." I've discovered THE most fabulous blog, Tara Dillard, that is chock full of info on gardening, landscaping, and how to make the most of what we've got!! I've been ~~(stuck)~~ lost in her blog all morning. Her writing is delicious as well...better than any gardening book. Other than hers, of course (and I'm on the search for a few of those!). Thank goodness My Guy left the house for a bit; otherwise, he would've pulled the plug on me.

Saturdays usually bring some yard work; but it's drizzling away...so back to daydreaming about what the future may hold.

Sweet Saturday to you all...

XOXO

Resources for Panicky Parents of Prodigals

2010-05-13T16:24:00.000-07:00

This post is a serious post. If you're not a parent of a prodigal, ADD, ADHD, Bipolar, mentally challenged, addiction-prone, angry, lost, young person, feel free to move on. Perhaps my next post will be lighthearted...

In two days, two strangers called me. They'd heard I might empathize. And yes I can. They are not the only Moms that I've been in touch with. Some families try to cover up. Not me - I'm an open book and believe God wants me to share in the peaks AND valleys! It might be handy for some to see a list of resources that I know is reliable:

NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness - contact them for a local peer group. For you OR your kid. It covers the gamut: Bipolar, Autism, Suicide, Schizophrenia, OCD, PTSD, Eating Disorders and more.

Cornerstone Recovery: a unique teen-based, 12-step recovery program, based on positive peer pressure and a drug and alcohol free environment. (This is a Houston organization; but they will have recommendations for out of towners).

And just today, a friend emailed me a link for reading on prodigal sons. Looks great - check it out!

Sundown Ranch: a treatment facility designed to meet the needs of individuals suffering from chemical dependency and related co-occurring psychiatric disorders. (Yup, #2 Son was a resident here...for 45 days).

Russell Kelfer's Website: his sermons/books are free & you can download many. In Everything Give Thanks pretty much changed my life!

And the #1 source of comfort, respite, peace is my faith. God sees me through it all. I tell everyone that without Him, I'd be in a loony bin, an alcoholic or on the side of the road - blubbering. I kid you not.

...and there are a group of women - who have been together over 10 years almost every Tuesday night. Have we shared! Cried! Laughed! And prayed. Moms need girlfriends. And those that pray (without judgement) have to be THE BEST!

xoxo

Home Life = Priceless!

2010-05-13T08:54:00.000-07:00

(Books="low", from estate sale, Bottles=priceless, were Mom's)

I love the high, low & priceless combo - in and around my home, my attire, jewelry - it's just about the mix for me!

Thought it'd be fun to see if you can spot the HLP items in these vignettes...

Low = bust from Tuesday Morning

Priceless = candlesticks of my Mother's, old books of my parents

(no "high" in this vignette)...

Priceless = vessel holding marbles (wedding gift from aunt...)

Priceless = Uncle Russ' marbles

Low = "crumber" from antique shop

Low = green pears

Priceless = the rest, i.e., Mason's Vista red & white (Mom's), silver collected from estate sales, fleas, old books that are gifts from friends!

Low & priceless = silver tray from an estate sale

Low = black urn for flowers (Tuesday Morning)

Priceless = every book in my home...

Low = "silver" compote from GOOD WILL for $2.00!!!!!

Priceless = sand dollars from a dear friend in North Carolina

Priceless = "JOY" stone from an angel in Cape Cod

I've just realized my favorite "stories" in my home do not have anything HIGH. Not a lot of money is needed to make a vignette. I have a lot of stuff aka clutter - but every, single item means something to me. I (rarely) run out to buy something to fill a space.

Today is a good day...since I am home (alone) after a busy few days filled with company and activities. I have to agree with Jane Austen here:

"Ah! there is nothing like

staying home

for real comfort."

xoxo

Got To Know Where To Look...

2010-05-12T17:17:00.000-07:00

Not often; but yes sometimes....I find it hard to be joy-filled! It's been a rough couple days regarding "that" son of mine.

My friend over at Views From My Kitchen Sink posted on what made HER happy...so I am following suit, with only 3 items. Don't have 7 more at my fingertips.

A fresh head of auburn-ish hair
Groomed poodles
Anticipation of watching a DVR'd 24

Our home is quiet now and I'm ever so grateful. As hard as it was yesterday, right now I have my eyes and heart lifted up. And I DO know where to look!

Oh, one more thing! A new song and artist. LOVE this by Macy Gray!!!!

Heya throw your hands up and hollaXOXO

Throw your hands up and holla

When you don’t know what to do

Don’t know if you’ll make it through

Remember God is giving you beauty in the world...

XOXO

Revere While Here!

2010-05-09T13:32:00.000-07:00

If only.  I know it's not healthy to dwell on those - the "if onlys" but it' s hard NOT to on Mother's Day. I'm only 7 years younger than my Mom was when she died of non-Hodgkins lymphoma.
(a sidenote: she and Jackie O were the same age, died of the same disease, the same year; 1994.)

And so while I've had plenty of time to mourn...I'm here to confess that WHILE she was alive; I did not treat her as I'd like to now.   I'd revere my mother.

I didn't tell her what I loved about her. Ever. She wasn't prone to compliments in giving OR taking...and was hard to love.  My pride was bigger than my heart. In the past year I've confessed, let go, asked for forgiveness of those living.

Thankfully we have a houseful of (fun) company that will pull me out of "then" and bring me into "now." For now is important. And I've learned to speak my feelings. Tell those I love HOW much I do. Tell them they are creative, good cooks, artistic, organized, bright, handsome...and at times if I have to I'll dig deep to find that something special in them.

Everyone has something we can talk up and compliment. I'd say do it before it's too late.

Happy Mother's Day to you Beautiful Moms!!!!

The Mom in Me!

2010-05-07T05:09:00.000-07:00

A dear bloggy friend, Jen, has issued women quite the challenge. What is one weakness you have when it comes to mothering (only one)? And now that you've identified it, how are you going to improve? My "mothering" days are pretty much fini; but it's easy to nail a weakness and thankfully Jen is only asking for ONE! So I'd have to say it was the fact that I was not consistent. Oh, I'd be strong "in the moment" and know that I know that I know....and then, after getting run down by THE most insistent children on earth, I'd cave. It's hard to admit it. Yet rather cathartic. (Thanks, Jen!). I pray I use my (new-found) wisdom if/when grandchildren enter the picture. Part II: What is one of your strengths? Feel free to brag yourself up, either seriously or with humor. That I lived to tell about it. I kid you not. If you're a reader of this blog; you know what I'm talking about...And so my strength is flexibility, rolling with the punches; pulling my bootstraps up, gettin' on with life and not holding grudges. As my sister-in-law has told me many times: "God gave you these boys. YOU! No one else can parent them." There were many a time when I thought they might do me in in. But as Gloria Gaynor shouts at the top of her lungs: "I WILL SURVIVE!" (with a little help from my friends, and the good Lord above!). And I count it all as a privilege.